Maker/Mistaker Podcast with Jeff Finley https://jefffinley.org/blog/ We are powerful creators, yet we stumble and struggle. Overcome fear, self-doubt, and get inspired as Jeff Finley and his amazing guests give you unfiltered, real-talk about personal growth, finding happiness, love, and purpose. Honest and from the heart. Wed, 07 Dec 2022 13:53:00 +0000 en-US hourly 1 Blubrry PowerPress/9.7.3 We are powerful creators, yet we stumble and struggle. Overcome fear, self-doubt, and get inspired as Jeff Finley and his amazing guests give you unfiltered, real-talk about personal growth, finding happiness, love, and purpose. Honest and from the heart. Jeff Finley yes episodic Jeff Finley jeff82finley@gmail.com jeff82finley@gmail.com (Jeff Finley) Jeff Finley Real talk on our struggles as creators and makers. Maker/Mistaker Podcast with Jeff Finley http://jefffinley.org/wp-content/uploads/powerpress/1455727032-artwork.jpg https://jefffinley.org/blog/ Unicole Unicron – Pop Star Cult Leader and Spiritual Sex Tape Maker (ep 26) https://jefffinley.org/unicole-unicron/ Fri, 12 Feb 2016 18:46:21 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=5136 Ask yourself a few questions: Is it wrong for a self-proclaimed spiritual leader to make a high-priced sex tape on purpose to get more exposure for her work? Is it unethical to outwardly say you are brainwashing your audience? Is it bad to advertise that you run a cult and seek followers? Is it unsafe for someone to be obsessed with celebrity culture and dream to be famous one day? Or is intent everything?  In episode 26 of the Maker/Mistaker podcast, you are in for a treat. Today's guest is Unicole Unicron, who describes herself as a "Pop Star Cult Leader and Digital Salvationist, or spiritual transhumanist... highly productive and creates content on a variety of platforms." She's one of the most interesting and creative humans I've ever met. She too suffered from severe anxiety and depression and feeling like she did not fit in no matter where she went. She describes tools on how she was able to find her way out of the darkness of depression and into the light of self-love and joy. Her goal is to inspire others to live in a constant state of JOY and she uses a variety of digital platforms to express that message. But what makes her so unique and interesting to me is how she flips the script on the methods that the occult elite have used for centuries to manipulate the masses and gain their own version of power based on greed. But what if you knew how to use those techniques to spread a positive message and empower others? I love how she just flat out OWNS her desires and intentions. She certainly challenges a lot of assumptions and at first glance you might think she's crazy. But she's incredibley aware, intellegent, and thoughtful. Listen to the episode and decide for yourself. Updates from Me: Get your Starseed Patches here! I soft-launched Starseed Supply Co. Follow @StarseedSupply on Twitter Follow @StarseedSupply on Instagram I released a pack of Peaceful Alarm Ringtones for iPhone and Android.   Topics Covered in this Episode Who is Unicole Unicron? Why does she call herself a Pop Star Cult Leader? How did you get your occult aesthetic? Do you call yourself a Starseed? What was your awakening like? Suffering from severe depression and anxiety Not fitting into society no matter what she did Healing out of depression, slowly but surely We The Arcturians book triggering Starseed awakening Not resonating with the Pleiadians at the time Why do you use the term Brainwashing? Brainwashing for good and not greed What is JOY and how to The path to Joy = Ascension Obsession with celebrity culture Celebrities are our modern-day spiritual leaders Why we are obsessed with celebrity? Finding your light in the darkness Your mess is your message Unialarms - waking up to affirmations Collaborating with other Starseeds Living in the Unitopia - Heaven on Earth The big picture - what does the future look like? Unicole's five steps to JOY Cynicism Attention Truth Creation Time & Dedication Attachment to our pain and fear You can CHOOSE to be in love or happiness Choosing happiness is like lifting weights How do we deal with our negative emotions? Authenticity and truth Channeling Mother Earth Being true to yourself really is changing the world The power of FOCUSING our consciosness The power of ATTENTION - a commodity/commodeity Why do you want to be famous? Sex Tape - Uniporn How does the sex tape fit into your vision? Sexuality is HOLY Unicole's reasons why she is making a porn film Shames around making money and sexuality Cam Church every Sunday Morning Sex - Casual, Monogamous, Telepathic Sex is more than just physical or spiritual Am I still not drinking coffee? Find Unicole all over the Web Unicole Unicron official site Outside Time and Space (music project) Uniporn (sex tape) Cam Church Unicult Un1v3rs3 Ask yourself a few questions: Is it wrong for a self-proclaimed spiritual leader to make a high-priced sex tape on purpose to get more exposure for her work? Is it unethical to outwardly say you are brainwashing your audience? Or is intent everything? 
In episode 26 of the Maker/Mistaker podcast, you are in for a treat. Today's guest is Unicole Unicron, who describes herself as a "Pop Star Cult Leader and Digital Salvationist, or spiritual transhumanist... highly productive and creates content on a variety of platforms."

She's one of the most interesting and creative humans I've ever met. She too suffered from severe anxiety and depression and feeling like she did not fit in no matter where she went. She describes tools on how she was able to find her way out of the darkness of depression and into the light of self-love and joy.

Her goal is to inspire others to live in a constant state of JOY and she uses a variety of digital platforms to express that message. But what makes her so unique and interesting to me is how she flips the script on the methods that the occult elite have used for centuries to manipulate the masses and gain their own version of power based on greed.

But what if you knew how to use those techniques to spread a positive message and empower others?

I love how she just flat out OWNS her desires and intentions.

She certainly challenges a lot of assumptions and at first glance you might think she's crazy. But she's incredibley aware, intellegent, and thoughtful. Listen to the episode and decide for yourself.
Updates from Me:

Get your Starseed Patches here!

* I soft-launched Starseed Supply Co.

* Follow @StarseedSupply on Twitter
* Follow @StarseedSupply on Instagram


* I released a pack of Peaceful Alarm Ringtones for iPhone and Android.

 
Topics Covered in this Episode

* Who is Unicole Unicron?
* Why does she call herself a Pop Star Cult Leader?
* How did you get your occult aesthetic?
* Do you call yourself a Starseed?
* What was your awakening like?
* Suffering from severe depression and anxiety
* Not fitting into society no matter what she did
* Healing out of depression, slowly but surely
* We The Arcturians book triggering Starseed awakening
* Not resonating with the Pleiadians at the time
* Why do you use the term Brainwashing?
* Brainwashing for good and not greed
* What is JOY and how to
* The path to Joy = Ascension
* Obsession with celebrity culture
* Celebrities are our modern-day spiritual leaders
* Why we are obsessed with celebrity?
* Finding your light in the darkness
* Your mess is your message
* Unialarms - waking up to affirmations
* Collaborating with other Starseeds
* Living in the Unitopia - Heaven on Earth
* The big picture - what does the future look like?
* Unicole's five steps to JOY

* Cynicism
* Attention
* Truth
* Creation
* Time & Dedication


]]>
Jeff Finley yes 1:29:18
Samantha Hess: Professional Cuddler (ep 25) https://jefffinley.org/cuddles/ Fri, 05 Feb 2016 06:32:46 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=5082 I have an unbelievable story to share with you. I had the chance to talk with the world-famous Samantha Hess, the affection-starved woman who divorced her husband to cuddle everyone she possibly could. She turned cuddling into her job, seriously. And then she got famous for it. I have an unbelievable story to share with you. I had the chance to talk with the world-famous Samantha Hess, the affection-starved woman who divorced her husband to cuddle everyone she possibly could. She turned cuddling into her job, seriously. I had the chance to talk with the world-famous Samantha Hess, the affection-starved woman who divorced her husband to cuddle everyone she possibly could. She turned cuddling into her job, seriously. And then she got famous for it.

She claims to have spent nearly 75,000 minutes cuddling in the last 2.5 years and has been featured on the cover of the Wall Street Journal and America's Got Talent. Through her greatest struggle, a touch-deprived marriage, she was able to find her purpose and offer her unique gift to the world.

It's such a fun interview. She's one of the most lively humans I've ever talked to.
"I was online and came across an article about a man giving away free hugs at a Saturday market. He was punked by another man offering Deluxe Hugs for $2. When I saw this my first thought was 'I would pay someone to just hold me and make me feel loved without wanting anything more,' and then it hit me that there had to be other people like me who go through moments when they just need a no strings attached hug. I decided that everyone deserved a place to go when these moments strike where they can feel like they matter without all the complications. "
The image that inspired Sam to start a cuddling business
Some gems from our conversation:
"No I can't wait around for him. I have to choose happiness for me. I had to choose ME. Absolutely 100%, I was worth the risk."

"You don't have to be the best version of yourself to be worthy of love."

"Why isn't there a Starbucks for hugs?"


Topics Covered in this Episode

* How her cuddling skills landed her on America's Got Talent
* Becoming world-famous for cuddling
* Making a living and changing the world one hug at a time
* Ending a 13 year relationship because of
* Dating after divorce - 100 dates in 3 months
* Abandonment issues
* Living with abundance without attachment
* Not depending on the "Happily Ever After"
* Loving and being happy RIGHT NOW
* There's gotta be so many people out there hurting and lonely
* What about the "sexual" part that is bound to come up?
* Boundaries in cuddling and what you can't do
* Cuddle certification program
* Healing the inner-child in all of us
* Staying positive and keeping shame and judgment out of the picture
* Focusing on personal growth and self acceptance
* How to get a job as a Professional Cuddler
* Embracing awkwardness as proof that you're challenging yourself
* How do you scale the cuddling business?
* Finding your purpose through where you struggle the most

Links:

* CuddleUpToMe
* Certified Cuddlers
* Samantha's book Touch: The Power of Human Connection
* Samantha on Facebook and Twitter
* It's not about the nail

About Samantha
Samantha Hess, owner of Cuddle Up To Me has established herself as the industry expert. In the last 2 years she has professionally cuddled more than 50,000 minutes,  written a book, opened a 3,500 sq ft retail space, hired 3 employees, designed and ran the world’s first cuddling convention, and now she brings the only hands on certification program that will standardize the profession and legitimize the industry. Samantha Hess is on a mission to take over the world, one hug at a time!

Samantha recently released Touch: The Power of Human Connection. The book explores the science and psychology behind cuddling and offers detailed ...]]>
Jeff Finley yes 1:01:01
Alpha Males, BDSM, and The Red Pill (ep 24) https://jefffinley.org/alpha/ Tue, 26 Jan 2016 07:53:44 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=5069 Hey friend, I just got back in from being outside in my car after midnight in the rain - recording a podcast! This episode is just me talking about what I've been interested in the past few weeks. I've been reading a lot about manifesting money as well as The Red Pill. When a man wants advice on dating or relationships, where does he go? His parents? His friends? The internet usually. And if you do any searching for this, you're sure to run across the PUA (pickup artist) scene and The Red Pill. Both are large, community driven groups aimed at helping men have more success with women. Both have been criticized for being crass, manipulative, and misogynist. But I found myself endlessly curious and it took up a large part of my reading this month. Find out what I think in this episode of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast. I talk about healing my inner Alpha as well as my curious look into the BDSM community and The Red Pill Topics Covered in this episode: My move to Austin begins this weekend! Starting my new life and what I want to do when I get there Digital Detox Update: Quitting Facebook and Instagram Taking Yoga classes, Kirtan, and Meditation Group Worried about money, scarcity mentality How much money I make per month Manifesting money and abundance Get Rich Lucky Bitch book on manifesting money A Happy Pocket Full of Money book The Red Pill subreddit Alan Roger Currie - Mode One book Leandra Vane interview on my podcast Four letters that helped me feel better as a man: BDSM Fetlife BDSM community The Rational Male blog and book Men being raised in a Feminist Culture David Deida - Way of the Superior Man No More Mr. Nice Guy Why desire fades in long term relationships The dance of masculine and feminine energies Esther Perel - Mating in Captivity book Catalyst Con in Chicago Hey friend, I just got back in from being outside in my car after midnight in the rain - recording a podcast! This episode is just me talking about what I've been interested in the past few weeks. I've been reading a lot about manifesting money as well...
When a man wants advice on dating or relationships, where does he go? His parents? His friends? The internet usually. And if you do any searching for this, you're sure to run across the PUA (pickup artist) scene and The Red Pill. Both are large, community driven groups aimed at helping men have more success with women. Both have been criticized for being crass, manipulative, and misogynist. But I found myself endlessly curious and it took up a large part of my reading this month.

Find out what I think in this episode of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast. I talk about healing my inner Alpha as well as my curious look into the BDSM community and The Red Pill
Topics Covered in this episode:

* My move to Austin begins this weekend!
* Starting my new life and what I want to do when I get there
* Digital Detox Update: Quitting Facebook and Instagram
* Taking Yoga classes, Kirtan, and Meditation Group
* Worried about money, scarcity mentality
* How much money I make per month
* Manifesting money and abundance
* Get Rich Lucky Bitch book on manifesting money
* A Happy Pocket Full of Money book
* The Red Pill subreddit
* Alan Roger Currie - Mode One book
* Leandra Vane interview on my podcast
* Four letters that helped me feel better as a man: BDSM
* Fetlife BDSM community
* The Rational Male blog and book
* Men being raised in a Feminist Culture
* David Deida - Way of the Superior Man
* No More Mr. Nice Guy
* Why desire fades in long term relationships
* The dance of masculine and feminine energies
* Esther Perel - Mating in Captivity book
* Catalyst Con in Chicago
]]>
Jeff Finley yes 46:42
Krista Raisa – Starseed Creators, Channelers, and Alien Frogs (ep 23) https://jefffinley.org/krista-raisa/ Wed, 06 Jan 2016 04:02:29 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=5018 This was such a fun episode, but it's definitely one of the more far out episodes. And I love it! Today's guest is Krista Raisa, aka Galactic Faery. She and I recently collaborated on a music project as well as some Starseed patches! Krista is such a fun and beautiful soul. She's got a wildly popular YouTube channel and has written a bunch of books. She makes a ton of cool patches and clothing items on her Etsy store and channels extraterrestrial beings called The Orion Council. This episode was really fun as we get to share the story of Krista's awakening and realization of her Starseed nature and channeling abilities. Find Krista Raisa on the web Krista Raisa official site Krista "Ezoterrarist" on Soundcloud Krista Raisa - Galactic Faery - on Instagram Krista Raisa on Twitter Krista on YouTube Krista's Angels creations on Etsy Krista on Facebook About Krista Raisa Krista Raisa is an accomplished psychic medium, multi-dimensional channel, intuitive artist, spiritual teacher and healer. She is well-known internationally thanks in large part to her success as a YouTube sensation. Her YouTube Channel has thousands of subscribers from all across the globe. With an African-American, Finnish and Lakota ancestry, she was raised in New York City, and has lived and studied in Finland. Currently she resides in Sedona, Arizona. Krista’s mainstream education includes Master’s Degree studies in English Literature with a heavy focus on Psychology and Cultural Studies. Non-conventional studies include certification as an Angel Tarot Reader by Doreen Virtue as well as having attained the level of Master in Usui Reiki Healing. Krista is bi-lingual speaking fluent English and Finnish, as well as Spanish basics. Her flair for art and hip-hop serve as other mediums for self-expression. Awakening to the spiritual nature of reality began for her at an early age when she built an altar in her closet at age nine, but it wasn’t until 2011 that it moved to the forefront and became the main driving force in her life. Krista always had a strong desire to help our planet and the life living on it. From a very early age she developed a strong connection to Mother Earth and the Nature Spirits, and as her psychic abilities continued to develop she eventually became aware of her cosmic origins and ancestry as a Starseed. A Starseed is someone who’s soul or spirit has Extra-terrestrial origins. We are all part of a connected conscious universe that is alive and teeming with life. Krista is a contactee and an ambassador for a collective known as the Orion Council. In 2011 this collective revealed themselves to Krista as she spontaneously began trance channeling in a Whole Foods car park! Orion Council are a benevolent group of E.T.s, accompanied by Angels, Archangels and other conscious forms of life. Krista has since authored 6 books on Spirituality, Metaphysics and Self-Help topics, some of which can be purchased from Amazon.com. Furthermore, her hand-made arts and crafts are highly rated on Etsy.com. Krista is available for private readings, life coaching, workshops, group sessions, teaching, live events, and public speaking. She is very knowledgeable in a multitude of areas and is passionate about transposing star consciousness with art and music. Working with clients physically and also in the dream-space and multi-dimensionally is very common in her practice. Topics Covered in this Episode Sedona, Arizona Awesome patches including 11:11! Get yours at http://makermistaker.com/patches Starseed creators to live your purpose Krista's creations on Etsy - Dreamcatchers, Krista's story, waking up to her channeling abilities Growing up in New York, college in Finland Dark night of the soul and hitting rock bottom emotionally Verbal abuse, bullying Seeing 11:11 all the time Giant alien frogs, just your average awakening Watching Spike Lee's Malcom X Depression This was such a fun episode, but it's definitely one of the more far out episodes. And I love it! Today's guest is Krista Raisa, aka Galactic Faery. She and I recently collaborated on a music project as well as some Starseed patches! - Krista Raisa, aka Galactic Faery. She and I recently collaborated on a music project as well as some Starseed patches!

Krista is such a fun and beautiful soul. She's got a wildly popular YouTube channel and has written a bunch of books. She makes a ton of cool patches and clothing items on her Etsy store and channels extraterrestrial beings called The Orion Council. This episode was really fun as we get to share the story of Krista's awakening and realization of her Starseed nature and channeling abilities.
Find Krista Raisa on the web

* Krista Raisa official site
* Krista "Ezoterrarist" on Soundcloud
* Krista Raisa - Galactic Faery - on Instagram
* Krista Raisa on Twitter
* Krista on YouTube
* Krista's Angels creations on Etsy
* Krista on Facebook

About Krista Raisa
Krista Raisa is an accomplished psychic medium, multi-dimensional channel, intuitive artist, spiritual teacher and healer. She is well-known internationally thanks in large part to her success as a YouTube sensation. Her YouTube Channel has thousands of subscribers from all across the globe. With an African-American, Finnish and Lakota ancestry, she was raised in New York City, and has lived and studied in Finland. Currently she resides in Sedona, Arizona.

Krista’s mainstream education includes Master’s Degree studies in English Literature with a heavy focus on Psychology and Cultural Studies. Non-conventional studies include certification as an Angel Tarot Reader by Doreen Virtue as well as having attained the level of Master in Usui Reiki Healing. Krista is bi-lingual speaking fluent English and Finnish, as well as Spanish basics. Her flair for art and hip-hop serve as other mediums for self-expression.

Awakening to the spiritual nature of reality began for her at an early age when she built an altar in her closet at age nine, but it wasn’t until 2011 that it moved to the forefront and became the main driving force in her life. Krista always had a strong desire to help our planet and the life living on it. From a very early age she developed a strong connection to Mother Earth and the Nature Spirits, and as her psychic abilities continued to develop she eventually became aware of her cosmic origins and ancestry as a Starseed. A Starseed is someone who’s soul or spirit has Extra-terrestrial origins. We are all part of a connected conscious universe that is alive and teeming with life.

Krista is a contactee and an ambassador for a collective known as the Orion Council. In 2011 this collective revealed themselves to Krista as she spontaneously began trance channeling in a Whole Foods car park! Orion Council are a benevolent group of E.T.s, accompanied by Angels, Archangels and other conscious forms of life. Krista has since authored 6 books on Spirituality, Metaphysics and Self-Help topics, some of which can be purchased from Amazon.com. Furthermore, her hand-made arts and crafts are highly rated on Etsy.com.

Krista is available for private readings, life coaching, workshops, group sessions, teaching, live events, and public speaking. She is very knowledgeable in a multitude of areas and is passionate about transposing star consciousness with art and music.]]>
Jeff Finley yes 1:07:31
Leandra Vane – Trophy Wife: Sexuality, Disability, and Femininity (ep 22) https://jefffinley.org/leandra-vane/ Thu, 10 Dec 2015 21:55:31 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=4859 I'm quite excited about this episode of the podcast. I talk with Leandra Vane, author of one of my favorite books Trophy Wife: Sexuality, Disability, Femininity. It might be one of my more "controversial" episodes because we talk openly about sex, porn, disability, kink, BDSM, sexual fantasies, open relationships, fear, shame, and shit. Leandra has a way about her that makes these subjects feel relatable and safe to talk about. Leandra Vane - The Unlaced Librarian I loved her book. Here's my five star review I just posted. One of the best books I've read in a while. Such honest and intimate writing. It was so relatable and I found myself feeling inspired and hopeful for my own "sexual coming-of-age" in my 30s. We may not all have the same challenges, but are all "passing" in some form or another. Meaning, we try to fit into society and "be normal", but are hiding our true selves underneath fear and shame. Leandra puts this struggle into such beautiful words. She doesn't hold back and has the courage to talk about taboo subjects with such intelligence and vulnerability. I can't recommend this book enough for anyone who is trying to be more authentic and true to themselves Topics covered in this episode: Having a disability Feeling different from everyone else Fear and shame around our bodies, sexuality, and kinks Femininity and "one of the guys" Shit... yes, shit. Bowel and bladder issues in dating BDSM and Kink Honesty and authenticity "Passing" as a "normal" or a socially acceptable person instead of being ourselves Pornography and "porn therapy" Erotica and fan fiction Devotees and disability fetishists Body Identity Sexual objectification Open relationships and polyamory Ethical Non Monogamy Get in touch with Leandra Vane The Unlaced Librarian blog Trophy Wife: Sexuality, Femininity, Disability book Leandra Vane on YouTube Leandra Vane on Twitter Leandra Vane on Facebook I'm quite excited about this episode of the podcast. I talk with Leandra Vane, author of one of my favorite books Trophy Wife: Sexuality, Disability, Femininity. It might be one of my more "controversial" episodes because we talk openly about sex, Leandra Vane, author of one of my favorite books Trophy Wife: Sexuality, Disability, Femininity. It might be one of my more "controversial" episodes because we talk openly about sex, porn, disability, kink, BDSM, sexual fantasies, open relationships, fear, shame, and shit. Leandra has a way about her that makes these subjects feel relatable and safe to talk about.

Leandra Vane - The Unlaced Librarian
I loved her book. Here's my five star review I just posted.
One of the best books I've read in a while. Such honest and intimate writing. It was so relatable and I found myself feeling inspired and hopeful for my own "sexual coming-of-age" in my 30s. We may not all have the same challenges, but are all "passing" in some form or another. Meaning, we try to fit into society and "be normal", but are hiding our true selves underneath fear and shame. Leandra puts this struggle into such beautiful words. She doesn't hold back and has the courage to talk about taboo subjects with such intelligence and vulnerability. I can't recommend this book enough for anyone who is trying to be more authentic and true to themselves
Topics covered in this episode:

* Having a disability
* Feeling different from everyone else
* Fear and shame around our bodies, sexuality, and kinks
* Femininity and "one of the guys"
* Shit... yes, shit.
* Bowel and bladder issues in dating
* BDSM and Kink
* Honesty and authenticity
* "Passing" as a "normal" or a socially acceptable person instead of being ourselves
* Pornography and "porn therapy"
* Erotica and fan fiction
* Devotees and disability fetishists
* Body Identity
* Sexual objectification
* Open relationships and polyamory
* Ethical Non Monogamy

Get in touch with Leandra Vane

* The Unlaced Librarian blog
* Trophy Wife: Sexuality, Femininity, Disability book
* Leandra Vane on YouTube
* Leandra Vane on Twitter
* Leandra Vane on Facebook
]]>
Jeff Finley yes 1:35:23
Which Attachment Style are You? Anxious, Avoidant or Secure? (ep 21) https://jefffinley.org/attached/ Tue, 01 Dec 2015 21:27:38 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=4834 In this episode of the Maker/Mistaker podcast, I welcome April Hannah back on the show to discuss the book Attached - The New Science of Adult Attachment and How it Can Help You Find - And Keep - Love. Listen to the show by clicking the play button above, or find this episode in your podcast app or in iTunes. The idea of attachment styles in relationships is interesting. It's an attempt to shed new light on the patterns we have experienced in our relationships. Do we tend to attract unavailable partners or ones that want to control us? Do you have a fear of commitment or a fear that you'll never find the one? This book explains three different styles - anxious, avoidant, and secure. Personally, I thought the book was interesting and definitely helped make me more aware of some of my patterns. But I felt like I could relate to ALL the different styles, even within the same relationship. Sometimes I feel anxious and overly worried if the person isn't as close as I'd like. But then I'd feel anxious if they were getting too close. Hah! Whether you like labels or you don't, I think it's a cool way to look at it. Anxious attachment is rooted in the fear of abandonment. You crave being close to a partner but fear they won't ever love you as much as you love them. Avoidant attachment is rooted in the fear of losing independence or freedom. They like being in love, but are hypersensitive to being controlled or suppressed. The secure attachment is what you think, more balanced. There doesn't seem to be any overriding factor that constantly stresses out a person with a secure attachment style. First, some updates from me this week: Black Friday deal is still on! Wake Up VIP Package is now Pay What You Want Currently Reading - Leandra Vane's new book Trophy Wife: Sexuality, Disability, Femininity - Love her honesty and authenticity. She's inspires me as a blogger and writer. Also finished reading Outrageous Openess: Letting the Divine Take the Lead by Tosha Silver and Meditations on Tantra by OSHO Created another song called Look Around You and also a new track called Galactic Faery Grime for my Starseed sister Krista Raisa Which one are you? You can take the quiz here http://www.attachedthebook.com/compatibility-quiz/ When I took this quiz, I had a particular relationship at the forefront of my mind and I got anxious attachment. Yet I feel like the definition of secure suits me better. And while reading this book, I found that I resonated a lot with the avoidant tendencies - but I think that's because I'm just getting out of a 12 year relationship/marriage and I don't feel inclined to jump into a seriously committed relationship without exploring the single life for a little bit. It's hard to date and be romantic or sexual with women knowing you aren't looking for the next long term partner. That produces some avoidant anxieties there! I'm currently more about exploring options and finding out what's out there. So while I love being in love, I don't want to feel possessed. Whereas when I was 20, I was more inclined to pair up and be exclusive. I do love intimacy and closeness, and I'm not historically an avoidant, more anxious. Unless they are too controlling... Errm, I don't know what I am! :-) Even though I don't feel like I fit a particular label, it's helpful to know there's nothing wrong with me. And there is always a new way of looking at it. It has increased my awareness and has helped me come to terms with who I am. Yay! Make sure you check April Hannah's podcast Path 11! One of the best about consciousness and out of body experiences including interviews with greats like William Buhlman and Tom Campbell. In this episode of the Maker/Mistaker podcast, I welcome April Hannah back on the show to discuss the book Attached - The New Science of Adult Attachment and How it Can Help You Find - And Keep - Love. - Listen to the show by clicking the play button ... Attached - The New Science of Adult Attachment and How it Can Help You Find - And Keep - Love.

Listen to the show by clicking the play button above, or find this episode in your podcast app or in iTunes.

The idea of attachment styles in relationships is interesting. It's an attempt to shed new light on the patterns we have experienced in our relationships. Do we tend to attract unavailable partners or ones that want to control us? Do you have a fear of commitment or a fear that you'll never find the one? This book explains three different styles - anxious, avoidant, and secure. Personally, I thought the book was interesting and definitely helped make me more aware of some of my patterns. But I felt like I could relate to ALL the different styles, even within the same relationship. Sometimes I feel anxious and overly worried if the person isn't as close as I'd like. But then I'd feel anxious if they were getting too close. Hah!

Whether you like labels or you don't, I think it's a cool way to look at it.

Anxious attachment is rooted in the fear of abandonment. You crave being close to a partner but fear they won't ever love you as much as you love them.

Avoidant attachment is rooted in the fear of losing independence or freedom. They like being in love, but are hypersensitive to being controlled or suppressed.

The secure attachment is what you think, more balanced. There doesn't seem to be any overriding factor that constantly stresses out a person with a secure attachment style.
First, some updates from me this week:

* Black Friday deal is still on! Wake Up VIP Package is now Pay What You Want
* Currently Reading - Leandra Vane's new book Trophy Wife: Sexuality, Disability, Femininity - Love her honesty and authenticity. She's inspires me as a blogger and writer.
* Also finished reading Outrageous Openess: Letting the Divine Take the Lead by Tosha Silver and Meditations on Tantra by OSHO
* Created another song called Look Around You and also a new track called Galactic Faery Grime for my Starseed sister Krista Raisa

Which one are you?
You can take the quiz here http://www.attachedthebook.com/compatibility-quiz/

When I took this quiz, I had a particular relationship at the forefront of my mind and I got anxious attachment. Yet I feel like the definition of secure suits me better. And while reading this book, I found that I resonated a lot with the avoidant tendencies - but I think that's because I'm just getting out of a 12 year relationship/marriage and I don't feel inclined to jump into a seriously committed relationship without exploring the single life for a little bit.

It's hard to date and be romantic or sexual with women knowing you aren't looking for the next long term partner. That produces some avoidant anxieties there! I'm currently more about exploring options and finding out what's out there. So while I love being in love, I don't want to feel possessed. Whereas when I was 20, I was more inclined to pair up and be exclusive. I do love intimacy and closeness, and I'm not historically an avoidant, more anxious. Unless they are too controlling... Errm, I don't know what I am! :-)

Even though I don't feel like I fit a particular label, it's helpful to know there's nothing wrong with me.]]>
Jeff Finley yes 37:15
What You Don’t Know About Inspiration (ep 20) https://jefffinley.org/magic-inspiration/ Sat, 21 Nov 2015 21:09:28 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=4787 Here's a twist, what if you looked at inspiration and ideas as conscious beings? Non-physical entities not unlike imaginary friends. And those non-physical beings want to incarnate into physical reality. They want to become manifest in this world and they chose YOU to be the conduit. Why? Because you are a suitable partner! In today's Maker/Mistaker Podcast episode I talk about this new way of looking at inspiration and ideas. Click the play button above to listen to the episode in your browser. Or find it in iTunes or your favorite podcast app. Before I get into the topic, just a few quick updates from me. Updates from me: My eBook Wake Up is now Pay What You Want - get it here and name your price I'm moving to Austin in early 2016! I'm working on some ideas with my Austin friends for a Starseed event I made two new songs this week! What's this new way of looking at inspiration? Inspiration and ideas are attracted to you because they match your energy, your vibration, or your frequency. They are attracted to your skills and abilities and believes you are capable of giving birth to this idea in physical form. The idea follows you around and pesters you from time to time and gives you feelings of inspiration and even chills down your spine. You can choose to engage with the idea and actually begin to work on it. Or you can ignore it over and over until it goes away. Or you can flat out reject it. And when that inspiration dissipates, where does it go? What if it was simply moving to another suitable partner that was more willing to create it? Examples from Big Magic I'm in the middle of reading the book Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert and this is one of the concepts she writes about. She tells a story of how she had this amazing idea for a book and was in the middle of writing it when she had to put it on hold to take care of some other matters. When she came back to the book some time later, the inspiration had run out. She no longer could write it! She ended up meeting another author at a conference and the two became friends and pen pals. They wrote letters back and forth and developed a deeper connection. And one day they met up again and it turns out this author was writing the same book! The same storyline and everything, minus a few minor details. This idea left Elizabeth and found another creator to manifest itself. A Crazy Synchronicity And a crazy synchronicity happened after I read this part of the book. I logged into Instagram and saw a photo someone posted of some Starseed patches she had made and was selling in her Etsy store. I thought, "no fucking way." Because I had almost the exact same idea months ago! I even had the sketches to prove it. I was going to produce some Starseed patches just like hers - with illustrations accompanying the different ET races such as the Pleiadeans, Sirians, Orions, etc. She beat me to it. A photo posted by Krista Raisa (@galacticfaery) on Nov 20, 2015 at 2:38pm PST Here are just a few of my original sketches. I can't seem to find the rest that showed off my ideas for the different races. But you see the "Pleiadean" on the left page. A photo posted by Jeff Finley (@jeff_finley) on Aug 21, 2015 at 2:00pm PDT But I was too slow. I didn't give it as much time and attention and the idea left me. I ran out of inspiration and got distracted. Turns out this idea didn't just disappear, it found a new creator! The crazy part was how I actually noticed it and the timing of all this. How weird! In another synchronicity, I had started initial planning of my Starseed event that some friends and I working up. And I logged into Instagram a few months ago and this same person had posted a video herself asking her audience, "If there was an event for Starseeds, what would you want?" I thought it was uncanny that she had the same idea. Whatever inspiration being that I was tapped into, she was as well. Here's a twist, what if you looked at inspiration and ideas as conscious beings? Non-physical entities not unlike imaginary friends. And those non-physical beings want to incarnate into physical reality. They want to become manifest in this world and t...
In today's Maker/Mistaker Podcast episode I talk about this new way of looking at inspiration and ideas. Click the play button above to listen to the episode in your browser. Or find it in iTunes or your favorite podcast app.

Before I get into the topic, just a few quick updates from me.
Updates from me:

* My eBook Wake Up is now Pay What You Want - get it here and name your price
* I'm moving to Austin in early 2016!
* I'm working on some ideas with my Austin friends for a Starseed event

I made two new songs this week!



What's this new way of looking at inspiration?
Inspiration and ideas are attracted to you because they match your energy, your vibration, or your frequency. They are attracted to your skills and abilities and believes you are capable of giving birth to this idea in physical form. The idea follows you around and pesters you from time to time and gives you feelings of inspiration and even chills down your spine.

You can choose to engage with the idea and actually begin to work on it. Or you can ignore it over and over until it goes away. Or you can flat out reject it.

And when that inspiration dissipates, where does it go? What if it was simply moving to another suitable partner that was more willing to create it?
Examples from Big Magic
I'm in the middle of reading the book Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert and this is one of the concepts she writes about. She tells a story of how she had this amazing idea for a book and was in the middle of writing it when she had to put it on hold to take care of some other matters. When she came back to the book some time later, the inspiration had run out. She no longer could write it!

She ended up meeting another author at a conference and the two became friends and pen pals. They wrote letters back and forth and developed a deeper connection. And one day they met up again and it turns out this author was writing the same book! The same storyline and everything, minus a few minor details. This idea left Elizabeth and found another creator to manifest itself.
A Crazy Synchronicity
And a crazy synchronicity happened after I read this part of the book. I logged into Instagram and saw a photo someone posted of some Starseed patches she had made and was selling in her Etsy store. I thought, "no fucking way." Because I had almost the exact same idea months ago! I even had the sketches to prove it. I was going to produce some Starseed patches just like hers - with illustrations accompanying the different ET races such as the Pleiadeans, Sirians, Orions, etc.

She beat me to it.



A photo posted by Krista Raisa (@galacticfaery) on Nov 20, 2015 at 2:38pm PST




Here are just a few of my original sketches. I can't seem to find the rest that showed off my ideas for the different races. But you see the "Pleiadean" on the left page.



A photo posted by Jeff Finley (@jeff_finley) on Aug 21, 2015 at 2:00pm PDT




But I was too slow.

]]>
Jeff Finley yes 22:10
Uncovering “The Truth” about Sex and Relationships with April Hannah (ep 19) https://jefffinley.org/the-truth-sex-relationships-podcast/ Sat, 07 Nov 2015 04:51:09 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=4750 Two weeks ago I got message from April Hannah, whom you might remember from an older podcast about her Path Documentary Series. She had been listening to some of my recent podcast episodes about dating, love, and relationships and reached out to me to relate some of her own ideas. April is a well read and experienced psychotherapist and holistic mental health practitioner that's very familiar with helping people with their relationships. She proposed the idea of collaborating or doing a show about relationships and I loved the idea! I told her I was reading The Truth: An Uncomfortable Book About Relationships by Neil Strauss and it turns out she was too! So we thought we should start our collaboration by talking about this amazing and controversial book about love, sex, monogamy, infidelity, polyamory, sex parties, orgies, and sex addiction therapy. In the episode we start off by talking about Neil's book The Truth **Spoiler Alert! Read it first if you don't want to be spoiled** Then we transition into talking about sex and relationships in general. We cover a lot of ground and I plan on having on her on the show a few more times at least to dive deeper into these fascinating subjects! Topics discussed in this episode: Neil Strauss's new book The Truth: An Uncomfortable Book About Relationships Monogomy or Polyamory and other lifestyles Sex parties, New Age Tantra orgies, swinging, and harems How our relationships with our parents affect our adult relationships Relationship therapy and sex addiction rehab Porn, infidelity, and cheating Attachment styles, anxious, secure, and avoidant Love addicts and love avoidants Fears of abandonment and fears of commitment Honoring the Masculine and Feminine in each of us Links for this Episode Episode 9 of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast with April Hannah about her Path Documentary Series My original article about my feelings after reading The Truth The Truth book on Amazon Helen Fisher Mating in Captivity by Esther Perel Attached the book by Amir Levine Homecoming the book by John Bradshaw Opening Up by Tristan Taormino The Ethical Slut by Dossie Easton About April Hannah April Hannah, LMHC operates a wellness & psychotherapy office that serves people to achieve wellness for the mind, body and spirit. April Hannah offers a blend of traditional psychotherapy and energy practices to serve each individual’s needs. April A. Hannah, MS.Ed., LMHC is a New York State Licensed Mental Health Counselor, who provides services to individuals, couples, families and supervision to health professionals. Her approach to therapy blends holistic studies and cognitive behavioral techniques which are solution focused. Hannah's Healing - April's therapy practice April on Twitter and Facebook Two weeks ago I got message from April Hannah, whom you might remember from an older podcast about her Path Documentary Series. She had been listening to some of my recent podcast episodes about dating, love, April Hannah, whom you might remember from an older podcast about her Path Documentary Series. She had been listening to some of my recent podcast episodes about dating, love, and relationships and reached out to me to relate some of her own ideas. April is a well read and experienced psychotherapist and holistic mental health practitioner that's very familiar with helping people with their relationships. She proposed the idea of collaborating or doing a show about relationships and I loved the idea!

I told her I was reading The Truth: An Uncomfortable Book About Relationships by Neil Strauss and it turns out she was too! So we thought we should start our collaboration by talking about this amazing and controversial book about love, sex, monogamy, infidelity, polyamory, sex parties, orgies, and sex addiction therapy.

In the episode we start off by talking about Neil's book The Truth **Spoiler Alert! Read it first if you don't want to be spoiled** Then we transition into talking about sex and relationships in general. We cover a lot of ground and I plan on having on her on the show a few more times at least to dive deeper into these fascinating subjects!
Topics discussed in this episode:

* Neil Strauss's new book The Truth: An Uncomfortable Book About Relationships
* Monogomy or Polyamory and other lifestyles
* Sex parties, New Age Tantra orgies, swinging, and harems
* How our relationships with our parents affect our adult relationships
* Relationship therapy and sex addiction rehab
* Porn, infidelity, and cheating
* Attachment styles, anxious, secure, and avoidant
* Love addicts and love avoidants
* Fears of abandonment and fears of commitment
* Honoring the Masculine and Feminine in each of us

Links for this Episode

* Episode 9 of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast with April Hannah about her Path Documentary Series
* My original article about my feelings after reading The Truth
* The Truth book on Amazon
* Helen Fisher
* Mating in Captivity by Esther Perel
* Attached the book by Amir Levine
* Homecoming the book by John Bradshaw
* Opening Up by Tristan Taormino
* The Ethical Slut by Dossie Easton

About April Hannah
April Hannah, LMHC operates a wellness & psychotherapy office that serves people to achieve wellness for the mind, body and spirit. April Hannah offers a blend of traditional psychotherapy and energy practices to serve each individual’s needs. April A. Hannah, MS.Ed., LMHC is a New York State Licensed Mental Health Counselor, who provides services to individuals, couples, families and supervision to health professionals. Her approach to therapy blends holistic studies and cognitive behavioral techniques which are solution focused.

* Hannah's Healing - April's therapy practice
* April on Twitter and Facebook
]]>
Jeff Finley yes 1:12:14
Synchronicity and Living a Magical Life with Todd Acamesis – Part 2 (ep 18) https://jefffinley.org/synchronicity-part2/ Fri, 30 Oct 2015 04:42:45 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=4722 This is the second part of my interview with Todd Acamesis. We talk about synchronicity, out of body experiences, spiritual awakenings, and how to live a life full of joy and wonder. It's one of the most mind-blowing episodes I've ever done and we get into some really deep topics including the nature of reality, how thoughts manifest in the physical form, and even a bit of meditation. Open your mind, open your hearts. Don't believe what we say but try it for yourself. Choose what resonates and discard the rest! Enjoy the episode! Listen to Part 1 here Links for this Episode: Todd Acamesis on Facebook Synchronicity Walk official site Video of Todd hosting a walk Pandora Star OBE light machine This is the second part of my interview with Todd Acamesis. We talk about synchronicity, out of body experiences, spiritual awakenings, and how to live a life full of joy and wonder. It's one of the most mind-blowing episodes I've ever done and we get ...
Listen to Part 1 here

Links for this Episode:

* Todd Acamesis on Facebook
* Synchronicity Walk official site
* Video of Todd hosting a walk
* Pandora Star OBE light machine
]]>
Jeff Finley 1:23:11
Synchronicity and Living a Magical Life with Todd Acamesis – Part 1 (ep 17) https://jefffinley.org/synchronicity/ Thu, 22 Oct 2015 20:15:12 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=4709 I'm super pumped for this two part interview I did with Todd Acamesis. It will inspire you! Todd is a guy that has figured out how to turn daily life into a magical life. One that smashes boring routine and brings back that childlike wonder on a regular basis. He acts as an agent of synchronicity, or meaningful coincidence. He goes out of his way, or rather GETS out of the way, to let synchronicity be a driving force in his life. Imagine rolling dice and letting complete strangers tell you what to do next. There's trusting your intuition, and then there's trusting a stranger's intuition! Todd spent his younger years hitchhiking and trusting strangers, knowing that a larger, unseen force is guiding him to just what he needs. He releases worry and anxiety and lives in the present moment and is full of love, joy, and childlike glee. He's a super inspiring person to talk to, and I'm very happy to have him as a guest on my podcast. Listen to the PART 1 of my interview with him above. So what's synchronicity? What's a magical life? Have you ever experienced a coincidence that felt really meaningful? Like, not an ordinary coincidence. But one of those magical moments in life where you feel that things just lined up perfectly for you? Meeting someone at the right moment at the right time or when you think about a person and they call you. Those are simple examples of synchronicity. What if you could actually amplify or control these experiences to some degree? How the heck can you let go of control and trust this unseen force that many people call God, the Universe, Synchronicty, or WHATEVER. In fact, that's the beauty of this. You don't have to have to believe in God, have faith in anything, or be a member of any religion. You just have to open your mind and heart for a brief moment and accept that there may be more to life than you know. And then use your imagination and allow yourself to have fun. Then go with the flow. And see where it takes you. You'll notice you'll have plenty of judgement and fear pop up and that's ok. But what if you put it aside for now and let yourself be a kid? Todd has organized what he calls "Synchronicity Walks" where he gathers a group of curious and skeptical people for a magical walk through the city. They roll dice and leave the decisions up to "chance." What happens next is often remarkable and leaves grown adults laughing in disbelief and feeling once dormant sensations of wonder and awe and gratitude. Nothing like direct experience to expand your consciousness! Todd recently designed a deck of cards to offer suggestions and ideas to make the walks more fun. I had the pleasure of doing the illustration and graphic design for these cards and I'm so excited for them to be released and start hosting my own synchronicity walks. The power of synchronicity doesn't just happen on these walks, but in every day life. With practice you can feel more alive and more magical instead of boring and predictable. Thank you Todd for bringing this to the masses! Enjoy the episode! Links for this Episode: Todd Acamesis on Facebook Synchronicity Walk official site Video of Todd hosting a walk I'm super pumped for this two part interview I did with Todd Acamesis. It will inspire you! Todd is a guy that has figured out how to turn daily life into a magical life. One that smashes boring routine and brings back that childlike wonder on a regula... Todd Acamesis. It will inspire you! Todd is a guy that has figured out how to turn daily life into a magical life. One that smashes boring routine and brings back that childlike wonder on a regular basis. He acts as an agent of synchronicity, or meaningful coincidence. He goes out of his way, or rather GETS out of the way, to let synchronicity be a driving force in his life.

Imagine rolling dice and letting complete strangers tell you what to do next. There's trusting your intuition, and then there's trusting a stranger's intuition! Todd spent his younger years hitchhiking and trusting strangers, knowing that a larger, unseen force is guiding him to just what he needs. He releases worry and anxiety and lives in the present moment and is full of love, joy, and childlike glee. He's a super inspiring person to talk to, and I'm very happy to have him as a guest on my podcast.

Listen to the PART 1 of my interview with him above.
So what's synchronicity? What's a magical life?
Have you ever experienced a coincidence that felt really meaningful? Like, not an ordinary coincidence. But one of those magical moments in life where you feel that things just lined up perfectly for you? Meeting someone at the right moment at the right time or when you think about a person and they call you. Those are simple examples of synchronicity.

What if you could actually amplify or control these experiences to some degree? How the heck can you let go of control and trust this unseen force that many people call God, the Universe, Synchronicty, or WHATEVER. In fact, that's the beauty of this. You don't have to have to believe in God, have faith in anything, or be a member of any religion. You just have to open your mind and heart for a brief moment and accept that there may be more to life than you know. And then use your imagination and allow yourself to have fun.

Then go with the flow. And see where it takes you. You'll notice you'll have plenty of judgement and fear pop up and that's ok. But what if you put it aside for now and let yourself be a kid? Todd has organized what he calls "Synchronicity Walks" where he gathers a group of curious and skeptical people for a magical walk through the city. They roll dice and leave the decisions up to "chance." What happens next is often remarkable and leaves grown adults laughing in disbelief and feeling once dormant sensations of wonder and awe and gratitude. Nothing like direct experience to expand your consciousness!

Todd recently designed a deck of cards to offer suggestions and ideas to make the walks more fun. I had the pleasure of doing the illustration and graphic design for these cards and I'm so excited for them to be released and start hosting my own synchronicity walks.

The power of synchronicity doesn't just happen on these walks, but in every day life. With practice you can feel more alive and more magical instead of boring and predictable. Thank you Todd for bringing this to the masses! Enjoy the episode!

Links for this Episode:

* Todd Acamesis on Facebook
* Synchronicity Walk official site
* Video of Todd hosting a walk
]]>
Jeff Finley yes 1:08:22
True Love vs Toxic Love: 14 Core Differences (ep 16) https://jefffinley.org/true-love-vs-toxic-love/ Fri, 16 Oct 2015 20:53:00 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=4703 I saw this post yesterday on Facebook the other day and thought it was on point. It was a list of 14 core differences between true love and toxic love. I've experienced my share of both. It's always hard to define what true love is, but another word is unconditional love. You may have felt divine, true love in one moment, but then dipped back into attached and needy love the next moment. What is interesting, is as a collective, humanity is beginning to shift into more of the "true love" state of mind.At least, that's what I'm noticing for myself. This is what I am calling "new world." The "old world" paradigm is founded on separation, attachment, and fear. I notice thoughts and feelings come up that also carry this insight that this is "old world" and it's bubbling up to my awareness for me to heal and integrate. This is something I am seeing myself naturally progress to the more I follow my heart's instincts. "Love is not supposed to be painful. There is pain involved in any relationship but if it is painful most of the time then something is not working. Loving relationships are based upon appreciation & affection and not fear and manipulation." - Lightshifter.com Listen to this week's podcast episode where I break down this list and give my oh so humble opinion on the matter. 14 Differences Between True Love and Toxic Love (source I found it from, original source) Love: Development of self first priority. Toxic love: Obsession with relationship. Love: Room to grow, expand; desire for others to grow. Toxic love: Security, comfort in sameness; intensity of need seen as proof of love – may really be fear, insecurity, loneliness. Love: Separate interests; other friends; maintain other meaningful relationships. Toxic love: Total involvement; limited social life; neglect old friends, interests. Love: Encouragement of each other’s expanding; secure in own worth. Toxic love: Preoccupation with other’s behavior; fear of other changing. Love: Appropriate Trust (trusting partner to behave according to fundamental nature.) Toxic love: Jealousy; possessiveness; fear of competition; protects “supply.” Love: Compromise, negotiation or taking turns at leading. Problem solving together. Toxic love: Power plays for control; blaming; passive or aggressive manipulation. Love: Embracing of each other’s individuality. Toxic love: Trying to change other to own image. Love: Relationship deals with all aspects of reality. Toxic love: Relationship is based on delusion and avoidance of the unpleasant. Love: Self-care by both partners; emotional state not dependent on other’s mood. Toxic love: Expectation that one partner will fix and rescue the other. Love: Loving detachment (healthy concern about partner, while letting go.) Toxic love: Fusion (being obsessed with each other’s problems and feelings.) Love: Sex is free choice growing out of caring & friendship. Toxic love: Pressure around sex due to fear, insecurity & need for immediate gratification. Love: Ability to enjoy solitude by being alone. Toxic love: Unable to endure separation; clinging. Love: Cycle of comfort and contentment. Toxic love: Cycle of pain and despair. Love: Conversations based upon intent to Understand, Help, or convey affection. Toxic love: Conversations based upon intent to blame, defend, or manipulated I saw this post yesterday on Facebook the other day and thought it was on point. It was a list of 14 core differences between true love and toxic love. I've experienced my share of both. - It's always hard to define what true love is, 14 core differences between true love and toxic love. I've experienced my share of both.

It's always hard to define what true love is, but another word is unconditional love. You may have felt divine, true love in one moment, but then dipped back into attached and needy love the next moment.

What is interesting, is as a collective, humanity is beginning to shift into more of the "true love" state of mind.At least, that's what I'm noticing for myself. This is what I am calling "new world." The "old world" paradigm is founded on separation, attachment, and fear. I notice thoughts and feelings come up that also carry this insight that this is "old world" and it's bubbling up to my awareness for me to heal and integrate. This is something I am seeing myself naturally progress to the more I follow my heart's instincts.
"Love is not supposed to be painful. There is pain involved in any relationship but if it is painful most of the time then something is not working. Loving relationships are based upon appreciation & affection and not fear and manipulation." - Lightshifter.com
Listen to this week's podcast episode where I break down this list and give my oh so humble opinion on the matter.
14 Differences Between True Love and Toxic Love
(source I found it from, original source)

Love: Development of self first priority.
Toxic love: Obsession with relationship.

Love: Room to grow, expand; desire for others to grow.
Toxic love: Security, comfort in sameness; intensity of need seen as proof of love – may really be fear, insecurity, loneliness.

Love: Separate interests; other friends; maintain other meaningful relationships.
Toxic love: Total involvement; limited social life; neglect old friends, interests.

Love: Encouragement of each other’s expanding; secure in own worth.
Toxic love: Preoccupation with other’s behavior; fear of other changing.

Love: Appropriate Trust (trusting partner to behave according to fundamental nature.)
Toxic love: Jealousy; possessiveness; fear of competition; protects “supply.”

Love: Compromise, negotiation or taking turns at leading. Problem solving together.
Toxic love: Power plays for control; blaming; passive or aggressive manipulation.

Love: Embracing of each other’s individuality.
Toxic love: Trying to change other to own image.

Love: Relationship deals with all aspects of reality.
Toxic love: Relationship is based on delusion and avoidance of the unpleasant.

Love: Self-care by both partners; emotional state not dependent on other’s mood.
Toxic love: Expectation that one partner will fix and rescue the other.

Love: Loving detachment (healthy concern about partner, while letting go.)
Toxic love: Fusion (being obsessed with each other’s problems and feelings.)

Love: Sex is free choice growing out of caring & friendship.
Toxic love: Pressure around sex due to fear, insecurity & need for immediate gratification.

Love: Ability to enjoy solitude by being alone.
Toxic love: Unable to endure separation; clinging.

Love: Cycle of comfort and contentment.
Toxic love: Cycle of pain and despair.

Love: Conversations based upon intent to Understand, Help, or convey affection.
Toxic love: Conversations based upon intent to blame, defend, or manipulated]]>
Jeff Finley yes 33:52
Dating and Feeling Restless (ep 15) https://jefffinley.org/restless/ Thu, 08 Oct 2015 21:09:24 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=4412 This past week I've been feeling restless living at home with my parents. I came here to feel nurtured and comfortable after ending my marriage and working nonstop for 18 years of my life. And while I love my family and am grateful, they know I'm restless. It's nice to have a rent-free place to stay while I travel as well. But I'm finding that I just can't feel settled. I want to travel and explore! I want to have adventures! I want to experience love and freedom! That's what this week's episode of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast is all about. I'm gonna start traveling again after I take care of some things here in town. But I want to have extended stays in different cities. Portland comes to mind, but I was recently offered a place to stay in Asheville, NC. I might do that, we'll see. But lately I've been obsessed with dating apps. I went on two dates last week and had nice connections and I'm grateful. They definitely helped me expand my comfort zone and opened me up to what is possible. But the issue I'm struggling with is there's a desire to see these women again and get closer, but I know I'm going to have to leave and end whatever consistency we establish. Will people get hurt? Is this safe? Am I doing this right? I wonder how much I want to keep this dating thing going. If I'm being honest, it's fun but exhausting. It can be a lot of swiping and starring and messaging just to get a date. And then what? I still like to use these apps like OK Cupid and Tinder to meet people I never would otherwise know or consider asking out. I am enjoying it for now, but I know it's just temporary and something I'm "getting out of my system" so to speak. My real priority is me and my personal growth. I find that when I'm feeling safe, secure, and loved by myself then good things tend to happen to me. You know, not giving that power away to other people. When I'm going after what I love and what feels inspiring, people are attracted to that and they come to me. It's a lot better than me feeling lonely and swiping right on 100 Tinder profiles only to get a few automated bot messages back. Haha! The takeaways in this episode are put the intent out there and be “open to receive” be grateful for every experience and know that it’s temporary everything is a mirror reflecting back your state of being This past week I've been feeling restless living at home with my parents. I came here to feel nurtured and comfortable after ending my marriage and working nonstop for 18 years of my life. And while I love my family and am grateful,
That's what this week's episode of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast is all about. I'm gonna start traveling again after I take care of some things here in town. But I want to have extended stays in different cities. Portland comes to mind, but I was recently offered a place to stay in Asheville, NC. I might do that, we'll see.

But lately I've been obsessed with dating apps. I went on two dates last week and had nice connections and I'm grateful. They definitely helped me expand my comfort zone and opened me up to what is possible. But the issue I'm struggling with is there's a desire to see these women again and get closer, but I know I'm going to have to leave and end whatever consistency we establish. Will people get hurt? Is this safe? Am I doing this right?

I wonder how much I want to keep this dating thing going. If I'm being honest, it's fun but exhausting. It can be a lot of swiping and starring and messaging just to get a date. And then what? I still like to use these apps like OK Cupid and Tinder to meet people I never would otherwise know or consider asking out. I am enjoying it for now, but I know it's just temporary and something I'm "getting out of my system" so to speak.

My real priority is me and my personal growth. I find that when I'm feeling safe, secure, and loved by myself then good things tend to happen to me. You know, not giving that power away to other people. When I'm going after what I love and what feels inspiring, people are attracted to that and they come to me. It's a lot better than me feeling lonely and swiping right on 100 Tinder profiles only to get a few automated bot messages back. Haha!
The takeaways in this episode are

* put the intent out there and be “open to receive”
* be grateful for every experience and know that it’s temporary
* everything is a mirror reflecting back your state of being
]]>
Jeff Finley yes 15:05
Now is the Time to Create From Our Hearts – with Elz Anders (ep 14) https://jefffinley.org/create-from-our-hearts/ Fri, 02 Oct 2015 14:35:31 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=4401 We hear a lot about following your passion/heart these days, don't we? We also hear a lot about how messed up this world is with all the violence, war, and unfairness. But what can we do about it? My latest podcast episode was inspired by this amazing blog post by my friend Elz asking "What Will You Create?". Such an empowered voice! After reading the post I decided to invite this wise woman on the show. We talk about why now is the time to create from your heart. There is so much fear-based discussion about "the state of the world" and lots of people feeling powerless as to what they can do about it. There's a lot of complaining and consuming going on, but what about creating? What does being a heart-centered creator mean anyway? And what's the alternative? We even talked about how the Pixar movie Inside Out is super relevant to understanding ourselves and becoming more of our true, authentic self. We also talk about why authenticity is becoming a prime directive in this lifetime. Enjoy the show, and please comment! Links for the show: Elz Anders blog - LivingDiscernment.org What Will You Create? blog post Inside Out movie Charles Eisenstein's "The More Beautiful World" book We hear a lot about following your passion/heart these days, don't we? We also hear a lot about how messed up this world is with all the violence, war, and unfairness. But what can we do about it? My latest podcast episode was inspired by this amazing ... amazing blog post by my friend Elz asking "What Will You Create?". Such an empowered voice!

After reading the post I decided to invite this wise woman on the show. We talk about why now is the time to create from your heart. There is so much fear-based discussion about "the state of the world" and lots of people feeling powerless as to what they can do about it. There's a lot of complaining and consuming going on, but what about creating?

What does being a heart-centered creator mean anyway? And what's the alternative? We even talked about how the Pixar movie Inside Out is super relevant to understanding ourselves and becoming more of our true, authentic self. We also talk about why authenticity is becoming a prime directive in this lifetime.

Enjoy the show, and please comment!

Links for the show:

* Elz Anders blog - LivingDiscernment.org
* What Will You Create? blog post
* Inside Out movie
* Charles Eisenstein's "The More Beautiful World" book
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Jeff Finley yes 1:16:46
I Took a 5-Day Out of Body Exploration Class at The Monroe Institute (ep 13) https://jefffinley.org/obe-monroe-institute/ Sat, 26 Sep 2015 01:03:41 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=4383 In this episode of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast, I talk about my week at The Monroe Institute where I was enrolled in the 5-day Out Of Body Exploration Intensive workshop taught by William Buhlman. It was quite an experience. Listen to the episode to hear the story! William Buhlman lecture OBE Course Materials Me at William Buhlman at the Monroe Institute in 2015 Links Mentioned in this Episode: The Monroe InstituteOBE Intensive WorkshopWilliam Buhlman official siteMaha Mrityeonjaya Mantra by Hein Braat (beautiful meditation chant)Homecoming by John Bradshaw Additional Links: My first Out of Body experience everMy personal how-to guide on Astral ProjectionOut of Body Experiences - all in your head? Gossipist Podcast SUBSCRIBE Subscribe to the podcast in iTunesPodcast Archive | RSS Feed | Soundcloud | YouTubeLook us up in your favorite podcasting app. I like Pocket Casts. In this episode of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast, I talk about my week at The Monroe Institute where I was enrolled in the 5-day Out Of Body Exploration Intensive workshop taught by William Buhlman. It was quite an experience. In this episode of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast, I talk about my week at The Monroe Institute where I was enrolled in the 5-day Out Of Body Exploration Intensive workshop taught by William Buhlman. It was quite an experience. Listen to the episode to hear the story!




William Buhlman lecture



OBE Course Materials



Me at William Buhlman at the Monroe Institute in 2015




Links Mentioned in this Episode:



* The Monroe Institute* OBE Intensive Workshop* William Buhlman official site* Maha Mrityeonjaya Mantra by Hein Braat (beautiful meditation chant)* Homecoming by John Bradshaw



Additional Links:



* My first Out of Body experience ever* My personal how-to guide on Astral Projection* Out of Body Experiences - all in your head? Gossipist Podcast



SUBSCRIBE



* Subscribe to the podcast in iTunes* Podcast Archive | RSS Feed | Soundcloud | YouTube* Look us up in your favorite podcasting app. I like Pocket Casts.
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Jeff Finley 43:03
Love, Sex, and Building my Tribe (ep 12) https://jefffinley.org/love-sex-tribe/ Fri, 18 Sep 2015 19:37:08 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=4377 A common theme on my trip has been following my heart, surrendering to love, and awakening my sexuality. Yes, my sexuality. And I'm already feeling triggered and embarrassed just mentioning that. In this episode I break down my week on the road as I traveled through Austin, Houston, New Orleans, Georgia, and Asheville, North Carolina. I seem to be drawn toward connecting with women, but I'm beginning to realize there is a greater purpose for this. Now, in this podcast episode, I get really vulnerable and honest. I apologize in advance to anyone who hears what I'm saying and is triggered in any way. I must speak my truth, but I always feel unsafe when talking about people and they might listen to the show. But this is my honesty and authentic truth. So if you have an issue with what I'm saying, please talk to me about it. Two unrelated people sent me this message last week and a psychic told me I was building my tribe. If you look at the lions, it looks like the females are leading the pack. Boom.   As I come out of my marriage, which was largely a companionate, non-sexual relationship, I realize how much I had repressed myself in this area. I'm awakening to my sexuality and am starting to see hints of hope and fulfillment coming my way. I want to learn Tantra and learn how to express my truth and own this part of myself and heal emotional wounds. Listen to the episode to hear my story. Thanks for listening to me speak from my heart. Resources for this episode: Codependency and Narcisissm YouTube playlist Human Magnet Syndrome book Allison Armstrong books In Sync with the Opposite Sex Celebrating Partnership Keys to the Kingdom The Amazing Development of Men Understanding Women Enlightened Sex by David Deida SkyDancing Tantra Margot Anand Tantra Teacher Ecstatic Marriage SUBSCRIBE Subscribe to the podcast in iTunes Podcast Archive | RSS Feed | Soundcloud | YouTube Look us up in your favorite podcasting app. I like Pocket Casts. A common theme on my trip has been following my heart, surrendering to love, and awakening my sexuality. Yes, my sexuality. And I'm already feeling triggered and embarrassed just mentioning that. - In this episode I break down my week on the road as I...
In this episode I break down my week on the road as I traveled through Austin, Houston, New Orleans, Georgia, and Asheville, North Carolina. I seem to be drawn toward connecting with women, but I'm beginning to realize there is a greater purpose for this. Now, in this podcast episode, I get really vulnerable and honest.

I apologize in advance to anyone who hears what I'm saying and is triggered in any way. I must speak my truth, but I always feel unsafe when talking about people and they might listen to the show. But this is my honesty and authentic truth. So if you have an issue with what I'm saying, please talk to me about it.

Two unrelated people sent me this message last week and a psychic told me I was building my tribe. If you look at the lions, it looks like the females are leading the pack. Boom.

 



As I come out of my marriage, which was largely a companionate, non-sexual relationship, I realize how much I had repressed myself in this area. I'm awakening to my sexuality and am starting to see hints of hope and fulfillment coming my way. I want to learn Tantra and learn how to express my truth and own this part of myself and heal emotional wounds. Listen to the episode to hear my story.

Thanks for listening to me speak from my heart.
Resources for this episode:

* Codependency and Narcisissm YouTube playlist
* Human Magnet Syndrome book
* Allison Armstrong books

* In Sync with the Opposite Sex
* Celebrating Partnership
* Keys to the Kingdom
* The Amazing Development of Men
* Understanding Women


* Enlightened Sex by David Deida
* SkyDancing Tantra
* Margot Anand Tantra Teacher
* Ecstatic Marriage

SUBSCRIBE

* Subscribe to the podcast in iTunes
* Podcast Archive | RSS Feed | Soundcloud | YouTube
* Look us up in your favorite podcasting app. I like Pocket Casts.
]]>
Jeff Finley yes 45:12
I’m Completely Changing the Way I Do Podcasts (ep 11) https://jefffinley.org/changing-my-podcast/ Fri, 11 Sep 2015 05:57:53 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=4365 I talked to a new friend here at Circles and he inspired me to change the way I do my podcast. In fact, I talked to a few people who told me they liked it and want more of it. And I gave them a bunch of excuses why I wasn't making them so frequently. Here are my excuses to why I wasn't podcasting as much: I don't have anything important to say I dont' know who else to interview right now It's too much of a time commitment I think I need a co-host, I can't do it by myself It's a pain to edit and write show notes So this new friend encouraged me to just do it quick and dirty. Raw, real, and unfiltered. Together we shot down each of those excuses: I don't have anything important to say Bullshit. Just speak from the heart. Don't worry about teaching anything or being smart. Don't worry about coming up with something important. Just talk about what you talk about when you are in one of those deep conversations with people you like. Duh! I dont' know who else to interview right now You don't need to interview someone every time. Just share all this cool stuff you are into, man! You are growing so fast and learning so much, you talk about it in person with people, why not on the podcast? It's too much of a time commitment Forget the really long episodes. Do shorter ones that are more spontaneous.  I think I need a co-host, I can't do it by myself Relying on anyone else is just another barrier to actually doing it. Just speak from the heart! You don't need a cohost unless it naturally comes up.  It's a pain to edit and write show notes Then don't edit them! Seriously, editing and quality is overrated. You aren't going to win the game of best produced podcast. And it's not like you are recording in a noisy cafe. Forget the intro music, forget the editing out of bad parts, forget writing detailed show notes that take forever. Just record from the heart and post it. Nothing else really matters.  So that's it friends. Enjoy the new episode. I will be releasing one new episode a week. How long will I do this, well, I can't promise you anything. And if I try to set expectations, I'll rebel against them. So I'm just going to post a new episode every Friday. And see how long I can keep it up. Feel free to ask me questions! I will address them in podcast episodes! SUBSCRIBE Subscribe to the podcast in iTunes Podcast Archive | RSS Feed | Soundcloud | YouTube Look us up in your favorite podcasting app. I like Pocket Casts. I talked to a new friend here at Circles and he inspired me to change the way I do my podcast. In fact, I talked to a few people who told me they liked it and want more of it. And I gave them a bunch of excuses why I wasn't making them so frequently.
Here are my excuses to why I wasn't podcasting as much:

* I don't have anything important to say
* I dont' know who else to interview right now
* It's too much of a time commitment
* I think I need a co-host, I can't do it by myself
* It's a pain to edit and write show notes

So this new friend encouraged me to just do it quick and dirty. Raw, real, and unfiltered. Together we shot down each of those excuses:

* I don't have anything important to say Bullshit. Just speak from the heart. Don't worry about teaching anything or being smart. Don't worry about coming up with something important. Just talk about what you talk about when you are in one of those deep conversations with people you like. Duh!
* I dont' know who else to interview right now You don't need to interview someone every time. Just share all this cool stuff you are into, man! You are growing so fast and learning so much, you talk about it in person with people, why not on the podcast?
* It's too much of a time commitment Forget the really long episodes. Do shorter ones that are more spontaneous. 
* I think I need a co-host, I can't do it by myself Relying on anyone else is just another barrier to actually doing it. Just speak from the heart! You don't need a cohost unless it naturally comes up. 
* It's a pain to edit and write show notes Then don't edit them! Seriously, editing and quality is overrated. You aren't going to win the game of best produced podcast. And it's not like you are recording in a noisy cafe. Forget the intro music, forget the editing out of bad parts, forget writing detailed show notes that take forever. Just record from the heart and post it. Nothing else really matters. 

So that's it friends. Enjoy the new episode.

I will be releasing one new episode a week. How long will I do this, well, I can't promise you anything. And if I try to set expectations, I'll rebel against them. So I'm just going to post a new episode every Friday. And see how long I can keep it up.

Feel free to ask me questions! I will address them in podcast episodes!
SUBSCRIBE

* Subscribe to the podcast in iTunes
* Podcast Archive | RSS Feed | Soundcloud | YouTube
* Look us up in your favorite podcasting app. I like Pocket Casts.
]]>
Jeff Finley yes 11:28
April Hannah and Michael Habernig – Beyond the Physical (ep 09) https://jefffinley.org/beyond/ Thu, 09 Jul 2015 05:19:52 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=4299 April Hannah and Michael Habernig of the Path Documentary Series On Episode 9 of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast, I talk with April Hannah and Mike Habernig, creators of The Path Documentary Series. A documentary trilogy about the afterlife, the realms beyond the physical and the science of consciousness. They are also the hosts of the fascinating Path 11 Podcast where they interview experts in consciousness exploration, out of body experiences, the paranormal, and other esoteric subject matter. Some of their guests include William Bulhman, Teal Swan, Todd Acamesis, Robert Waggoner, and Nancy McMoneagle. I discovered them after I started researching after my first few out of body experiences. I saw their films Afterlife and Beyond the Physical and they were really well-made and eye opening. At the time I didn't know much about this stuff so it was all extremely new and mind-blowing. Here are the trailers for the films below. The full films are available to see on Vimeo On-Demand or on Amazon Video. Mike and April blend the mediums of film, psychotherapy, intuition and visual effects to address the age old questions: Why am I here? What will happen when I die? Is there an afterlife? What is beyond the physical body? What is consciousness? More about Mike and April (from their website): Director Michael Habernig, the owner of Habernig Productions and Director of The Path Trilogy, unknowingly at first, created a path for himself. After years of investigation and interviewing experts in the field of healing and consciousness, Michael is slowly unraveling the science of the soul. By creating a series of films, Michael hopes to help viewers by giving a perspective on the subject of consciousness, that they may not have heard before and eventually the viewer will find their own path. His inspiration comes from his own soul’s journey and life experiences when he was confronted with many friends and family members who had died in a short period of time. These deaths in his life quickly sprung him on to his path. Along with running a video production company for over 10 years, Michael Habernig has over 15 years’ experience in film and video production. Producer April Hannah, the owner of Hannah’s Healing and Producer of The Path Trilogy has been on a path of healing and discovery ever since she was a young girl. She has always had an interest in the metaphysical world ever since she was a young child. Her early childhood experiences inspired and launched her into a career of psychotherapy and wellness while always striving to work on her spiritual path of development. Her goal for The Path Trilogy is to raise the consciousness level of the world, one viewer at a time. April brings a psychological awareness to the film that allows the viewers to connect with the filmmakers and feel connected to the concept that “we are all one” through the viewing of the films. Her experience working with clients in the spiritual realm also assisted in collecting the experts for the documentary. April’s clinical career began in 1999 and since then she has worked with people from all walks of life. Her clinical and healing practice includes having working with people of all ages from veterans, sexual abuse survivors, at risk children, the “severe mentally ill”, people with disabilities and those who are searching for their own path and purpose in life. Music for this episode (by me): SUBSCRIBE Subscribe to the podcast in iTunes Podcast Archive | RSS Feed | Soundcloud | YouTube Look us up in your favorite podcasting app. I like Pocket Casts. Links and Resources discussed in this episode: The Path Series official site The Path: Afterlife The Path: Beyond the Physical SHOW NOTES Coming Soon Rate the podcast on iTunes and leave us a comment about the show below! April Hannah and Michael Habernig of the Path Documentary Series - On Episode 9 of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast, I talk with April Hannah and Mike Habernig, creators of The Path Documentary Series. A documentary trilogy about the afterlife, April Hannah and Michael Habernig of the Path Documentary Series

On Episode 9 of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast, I talk with April Hannah and Mike Habernig, creators of The Path Documentary Series. A documentary trilogy about the afterlife, the realms beyond the physical and the science of consciousness. They are also the hosts of the fascinating Path 11 Podcast where they interview experts in consciousness exploration, out of body experiences, the paranormal, and other esoteric subject matter. Some of their guests include William Bulhman, Teal Swan, Todd Acamesis, Robert Waggoner, and Nancy McMoneagle.



I discovered them after I started researching after my first few out of body experiences. I saw their films Afterlife and Beyond the Physical and they were really well-made and eye opening. At the time I didn't know much about this stuff so it was all extremely new and mind-blowing. Here are the trailers for the films below. The full films are available to see on Vimeo On-Demand or on Amazon Video.




Mike and April blend the mediums of film, psychotherapy, intuition and visual effects to address the age old questions:

* Why am I here?
* What will happen when I die?
* Is there an afterlife?
* What is beyond the physical body?
* What is consciousness?

More about Mike and April (from their website):

Director Michael Habernig, the owner of Habernig Productions and Director of The Path Trilogy, unknowingly at first, created a path for himself. After years of investigation and interviewing experts in the field of healing and consciousness, Michael is slowly unraveling the science of the soul. By creating a series of films, Michael hopes to help viewers by giving a perspective on the subject of consciousness, that they may not have heard before and eventually the viewer will find their own path. His inspiration comes from his own soul’s journey and life experiences when he was confronted with many friends and family members who had died in a short period of time. These deaths in his life quickly sprung him on to his path. Along with running a video production company for over 10 years, Michael Habernig has over 15 years’ experience in film and video production.

Producer April Hannah, the owner of Hannah’s Healing and Producer of The Path Trilogy has been on a path of healing and discovery ever since she was a young girl. She has always had an interest in the metaphysical world ever since she was a young child. Her early childhood experiences inspired and launched her into a career of psychotherapy and wellness while always striving to work on her spiritual path of development. Her goal for The Path Trilogy is to raise the consciousness level of the world, one viewer at a time. April brings a psychological awareness to the film that allows the viewers to connect with the filmmakers and feel connected to the concept that “we are all one” through the viewing of the films. Her experience working with clients in the spiritual realm also assisted in collecting the experts for the documentary. April’s clinical career began in 1999 and since then she has worked with people from all walks of life. Her clinical and healing practice includes having...]]>
Jeff Finley yes 1:11:24
These are Things – The Pressure to Be Successful When All You Want is to Make Art (ep 08) https://jefffinley.org/thesearethings/ Mon, 18 May 2015 21:46:20 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=4124 On Episode 8 of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast, I sit down with Jen Adrion and Omar Noory of These Are Things. These are Things is a powerful illustration duo based in Columbus, OH that strives to make things they love. They've dealt with their fair share of success and failure. There was so much honesty and transparency in this conversation. If you are fortunate enough to taste "success," then you''ll find this pressure to keep doing what worked, even when you don't want to anymore. Sometimes you keep trying to "recapture the magic" you once had but never get "back there." How does it feel when you were a household name one day and then moving back in with your mom and dad and tossing 24,000 prints in the trash because they just aren't selling? How do you deal with failure? How do you keep on going and following your passion when your cool side projects become your day job and daily grind? And finally, how do you deal with being afraid to speak your truth and be your own unique self when there are vocal critics and haters out there? Jen and Omar bring a refreshing positive and loving energy to all these heavy subjects. Listen to the episode for the full story!   Music for this episode: Maker/Mistaker Podcast Intro by Jeff Finley SUBSCRIBE Subscribe to the podcast in iTunes Podcast Archive | RSS Feed | Soundcloud | YouTube Look us up in your favorite podcasting app. I like Pocket Casts. These are Things - How We Learned to Stop Worrying and Enjoy The Ride from Weapons of Mass Creation on Vimeo. SHOW NOTES 00:00:54 Introductions and Updates 00:02:40 Jen and Omar - Welcome to the show! 00:04:28 The story of success and failure that led to WMC Fest 00:08:00 It all comes crashing down, what are we gonna do? 00:09:00 Tess Vigeland speech At World Domination Summit 00:11:00 Being so open and vulnerable on stage 00:12:00 Sharing too much online 00:13:00 Moving back home with Mom and Dad 00:16:00 What else happened after WMC Fest 2013? 00:17:00 When your side project becomes your day job 00:18:00 Being discontent when you're supposed to be happy 00:20:00 Falling out of resonance with what you've created 00:22:00 The eBook curse! Closing the chapters in our lives 00:25:00 Doing the same thing for years 00:26:45 Things have changed, struggle to adapt 00:28:00 Being attached to the past while trying to move forward 00:29:40 Purging the old, feeling light 00:31:31 Deciding to make what we want all over again 00:33:20 Trying to recapture the magic of success but failing 00:34:00 Go Media's story of success and failure 00:39:00 FAB.com failures - the last straw 00:41:41 When something goes well, you feel pressure to keep it going 00:43:00 Throwing away 24,000 greeting cards and cutting your losses 00:45:15 The pressure to be important and successful as an artist 00:46:18 What do you do when sales just aren't there 00:48:00 Reducing expenses and cutting everything 00:50:00 What about getting a part time job? 00:51:20 The 100 Things project - making art every day! 00:59:00 Being your brand - authentic or not? 01:01:00 Having the courage to be yourself online 01:03:00 Choosing to stay small as a business, living a simpler life 01:05:56 Being transparent and dealing with criticism or haters 01:07:26 Is it ok to be different than your online reputation? 01:11:04 What if you feel ashamed about being weird? 01:04:00 Living up to expectations of your online brand 01:15:00 Never take advice from someone who doesn't have to be you 01:16:00 Public shaming and Jeff's experiences 01:19:00 Donglegate shame story 01:21:00 How hateful comments affect real people directly 01:23:40 Trying to get everyone to like you 01:26:24 Being nice, avoiding conflict 01:27:00 How to detach from results and dis-identify with your work 01:30:00 Advice for those afraid to speak their truth publicly On Episode 8 of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast, I sit down with Jen Adrion and Omar Noory of These Are Things. These are Things is a powerful illustration duo based in Columbus, OH that strives to make things they love.

On Episode 8 of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast, I sit down with Jen Adrion and Omar Noory of These Are Things. These are Things is a powerful illustration duo based in Columbus, OH that strives to make things they love. They've dealt with their fair share of success and failure.

There was so much honesty and transparency in this conversation. If you are fortunate enough to taste "success," then you''ll find this pressure to keep doing what worked, even when you don't want to anymore. Sometimes you keep trying to "recapture the magic" you once had but never get "back there." How does it feel when you were a household name one day and then moving back in with your mom and dad and tossing 24,000 prints in the trash because they just aren't selling?

How do you deal with failure? How do you keep on going and following your passion when your cool side projects become your day job and daily grind? And finally, how do you deal with being afraid to speak your truth and be your own unique self when there are vocal critics and haters out there?

Jen and Omar bring a refreshing positive and loving energy to all these heavy subjects. Listen to the episode for the full story!



 



Music for this episode: Maker/Mistaker Podcast Intro by Jeff Finley
SUBSCRIBE

* Subscribe to the podcast in iTunes
* Podcast Archive | RSS Feed | Soundcloud | YouTube
* Look us up in your favorite podcasting app. I like Pocket Casts.



These are Things - How We Learned to Stop Worrying and Enjoy The Ride from Weapons of Mass Creation on Vimeo.
SHOW NOTES

* 00:00:54 Introductions and Updates
* 00:02:40 Jen and Omar - Welcome to the show!
* 00:04:28 The story of success and failure that led to WMC Fest
* 00:08:00 It all comes crashing down, what are we gonna do?
* 00:09:00 Tess Vigeland speech At World Domination Summit
* 00:11:00 Being so open and vulnerable on stage
* 00:12:00 Sharing too much online
* 00:13:00 Moving back home with Mom and Dad
* 00:16:00 What else happened after WMC Fest 2013?
* 00:17:00 When your side project becomes your day job
* 00:18:00 Being discontent when you're supposed to be happy
* 00:20:00 Falling out of resonance with what you've created
* 00:22:00 The eBook curse! Closing the chapters in our lives
* 00:25:00 Doing the same thing for years
* 00:26:45 Things have changed, struggle to adapt
* 00:28:00 Being attached to the past while trying to move forward
* 00:29:40 Purging the old, feeling light
* 00:31:31 Deciding to make what we want all over again
* 00:33:20 Trying to recapture the magic of success but failing
* 00:34:00 Go Media's story of success and failure
* 00:39:00 FAB.com failures - the last straw
* 00:41:41 When something goes well, you feel pressure to keep it going
* 00:43:00 Throwing away 24,]]>
Jeff Finley yes 1:50:37
Is the Ego good or bad? (ep 07) https://jefffinley.org/ego/ Sun, 29 Mar 2015 03:19:47 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=835 On Episode 7 of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast, George and I discuss "The Ego" and it's cousin, the mind. What is the ego? What does it mean to be egotistical? Is the ego really the source of our suffering? Is the ego bad or good and should we get rid of it? On Episode 7 of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast, George and I discuss "The Ego" and it's cousin, the mind. What is the ego? What does it mean to be egotistical? Is the ego really the source of our suffering? Is the ego bad or good and should we get rid of it?
I admit, this episode was a little difficult for both of us. George and I aren't experts. We are both seekers of truth and self mastery. We both recognize that a topic that comes up a lot in meditation is the ego.



It was only a few weeks after my first meditation attempt that I began reading about the ego. If you ever listened to Eckhart Tolle, he talks a LOT about the ego, the mind, and our thoughts. And often how they are the cause for all the suffering we feel. So it would make sense to eliminate the ego right?

Well, not so fast. As I mention in the podcast, the ego is meant to keep us safe. But how?

My understanding, and yes, it's limited so bear with me, is that our ego is this false self. It's an identity or sense of who we are. We also attach ideas, concepts, and things to our sense of self. For example, we might associate ourselves with a particular political party, race, gender, class, religion, or sports team. Sometimes those external attachments are held so close to our sense of who we are, that if our attachment (let's use our favorite sports team as an example) gets attacked, we feel attacked. But we actually weren't attacked at all.

The ego is an illusion. It's a false sense of self. So what is our true self if not our personality or this identity? That's a big question. You see, throughout most of our life, we are trying to "find" ourselves by trying on different personalities. We go through high school and notice there are preps, jocks, nerds, goths, punks, skaters, stoners, etc. Heck, we may have even been all of them at one point. We lose those identities as we get older and we take on roles like husband, wife, mother, father - or at work we are the manager, the sales person, the CEO. Or maybe we try to create an identity around the possessions we have, or our achievements.



What did you write in your Twitter bio? That's usually associated with ego - our sense of self. The kind of self we present to the world. And it's always changing.
So again, who are we really?
There is an authentic self deep within. And it's often the goal of many spiritual practices. How do we find it? Meditation is a good way for people to tap into their true self behind all the layers of ego identity. The one that's always been there no matter what kind of personality you tried on. There's always the YOU that has observed and noticed all of it. Typically, this "true self" is defined as the silent observer of our thoughts. The one that is aware.

Strip away all your belongings and everything you associate with you. But you still exist right? Strip away your arms and legs. Do you still exist? Get rid of all the layers of the onion until there's nothing left to get rid of. This is the zero point field where the only thing left is the your true self.
Answer this question, "I am..."
When you run out of answers, just say the words, "I am..."  That's you.

Alright so this has gone a little further than I wanted to go for this post. I know I'm rambling. Check out our podcast episode for even more rambling on ego. This is just conversation, so just take our words with a grain of salt!



Music for this episode: Maker/Mistaker Podcast Intro by Jeff Finley


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* 1:16:31
Overcoming Procrastination and Perfectionism (ep 06) https://jefffinley.org/procrastination-perfectionism/ Tue, 24 Feb 2015 20:30:13 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=751 Just get started. Those three words are often the solution to procrastination. It's so simple, but so hard to do. Why? George and I had a really eye opening discussion about procrastination, and it's cousin perfectionism. I've been coaching clients on overcoming procrastination for a little over a month now and I'm already sensing some patterns that I also recognized in myself. We all put stuff off until tomorrow, but why? We are avoiding something that's uncomfortable. We are afraid of finishing something because of what people might say. We fear judgment, ridicule, or embarrassment. We fear our own success or making other people look small. We don't give ourselves the priority in life and we end up doing nothing but obligations for other people instead of what we really desire. We are overwhelmed, disorganized, and stressed out and can't find the time to start. We resist and we resist. We run out of willpower and we end up doing what feels good now instead of making progress on our goals. George and I get into all of these issues and more. And since we all know the solution is "just get started" we know there's more to it than that. A small bit of advice: Do something productive while you listen to this podcast! Music for this episode: New Year Bounce by Jeff Finley SUBSCRIBE Subscribe to the podcast in iTunes Podcast Archive | RSS Feed Look us up in your favorite podcasting app. I like Pocket Casts. Show Notes 00:00:40 Introductions and Updates 00:05:00 Coffee and sugar's effects on us 00:10:35 What is procrastination? 00:14:12 Perfectionism and fear 00:20:35 Looking for external validation and approval 00:25:00 Identification with your work 00:29:00 The solution for perfectionism 00:33:00 A simple cleaning habit to cure perfectionism 00:37:00 When  you're not sure where to start 00:39:00 How to save your willpower 00:43:00 Become a person that likes to complete tasks 00:46:00 Just take action, don't over think about it 00:54:00 Reward yourself for accomplishing tasks 00:57:00 Using your procrastination tendencies to your advantage 01:02:00 Acting on inspiration energy right away 01:05:45 Removing distractions as a cure for procrastination 01:11:45 Increase your self-esteem with small wins 01:13:30 Don't use willpower to resist, but to create 01:19:30 Become a person with real personal power 01:24:20 Don't start your day by procrastinating 01:27:00 Two elephant analogies 01:30:00 Resources and recommendations 01:37:00 Closing thoughts Links and Resources for Overcoming Procrastination: Happiness Hypothesis Kill Procrastination goal on Coach.me Jeff's thoughts on Killing Procrastination Grow Up: A Man's Guide to Masculine Emotional Intelligence Truth, Love, and Power concept Jeff's "No Coffee" detox iProcrastinate Podcast The War of Art Sean Was on curing perfectionism Are you a afraid of failure? Jessica Hische is a "procrastiworker" Execute book Newsfeed Eradicator for Chrome Stay Focused Chrome addon Locus of Control The 7 Secrets of the Prolific: The Definitive Guide to Overcoming Procrastination, Perfectionism, and Writer's Block Hillary Rettig website The Power of Habit The Maker/Mistaker Habits podcast The Miracle Morning book Rate the podcast on iTunes and leave us a comment about the show below! Just get started. - Those three words are often the solution to procrastination. It's so simple, but so hard to do. Why? George and I had a really eye opening discussion about procrastination, and it's cousin perfectionism. -
Those three words are often the solution to procrastination. It's so simple, but so hard to do. Why? George and I had a really eye opening discussion about procrastination, and it's cousin perfectionism.

I've been coaching clients on
overcoming procrastination for a little over a month now and I'm already sensing some patterns that I also recognized in myself. We all put stuff off until tomorrow, but why?

We are avoiding something that's uncomfortable. We are afraid of finishing something because of what people might say. We fear judgment, ridicule, or embarrassment. We fear our own success or making other people look small. We don't give ourselves the priority in life and we end up doing nothing but obligations for other people instead of what we really desire. We are overwhelmed, disorganized, and stressed out and can't find the time to start. We resist and we resist. We run out of willpower and we end up doing what feels good now instead of making progress on our goals.

George and I get into all of these issues and more. And since we all know the solution is "just get started" we know there's more to it than that. A small bit of advice: Do something productive while you listen to this podcast!

Music for this episode: New Year Bounce by Jeff Finley


SUBSCRIBE

* Subscribe to the podcast in iTunes
* Podcast Archive | RSS Feed
* Look us up in your favorite podcasting app. I like Pocket Casts.

Show Notes

* 00:00:40 Introductions and Updates
* 00:05:00 Coffee and sugar's effects on us
* 00:10:35 What is procrastination?
* 00:14:12 Perfectionism and fear
* 00:20:35 Looking for external validation and approval
* 00:25:00 Identification with your work
* 00:29:00 The solution for perfectionism
* 00:33:00 A simple cleaning habit to cure perfectionism
* 00:37:00 When  you're not sure where to start
* 00:39:00 How to save your willpower
* 00:43:00 Become a person that likes to complete tasks
* 00:46:00 Just take action, don't over think about it
* 00:54:00 Reward yourself for accomplishing tasks
* 00:57:00 Using your procrastination tendencies to your advantage
* 01:02:00 Acting on inspiration energy right away
* 01:05:45 Removing distractions as a cure for procrastination
* 01:11:45 Increase your self-esteem with small wins
* 01:13:30 Don't use willpower to resist, but to create
* 01:19:30 Become a person with real personal power
* 01:24:20 Don't start your day by procrastinating
* 01:27:00 Two elephant analogies
* 01:30:00 Resources and recommendations
* 01:37:00 Closing thoughts

Links and Resources for Overcoming Procrastination:

* Happiness Hypothesis
* Kill Procrastination goal on Coach.me
* Jeff's thoughts on Killing Procrastination
* yes 1:39:05 What I’ve Learned from 2 Years of Meditation (ep 05) https://jefffinley.org/meditation/ Mon, 26 Jan 2015 02:09:04 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=632 In episode 5 of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast, Jeff and George talk about meditation. Do you meditate? If not, why? Sometimes meditation can be intimidating or confusing. We break it down in hopes we can inspire you to add this amazing habit to your daily routine. Both of us have been meditating regularly for two years now and we want to share what we have learned. It has been a major component in our paths out of depression and has directly shaped the way we look at life now and in the future. More and more people are learning about meditation and it's cousin "mindfulness." We cover the basics of what meditation is and isn't as well as how you can do it. We talk about some of the benefits we have experienced and also get into both the practical applications of meditation and the spiritual. Some of the benefits we have seen after meditating for 2 years include: Depression is virtually completely gone Mindfulness lasts well beyond the meditation session Reduces stress and anxiety Deeper intuition and ability to sense energies Increased ability to stay attentive for longer periods of time Appreciation for solitude and silence More equipped to overcome addictions and bad habits Mind-blowing spiritual or mystical experiences Dramatically increased awareness of mind, body, and spirit Realization of how thoughts form and manifest in reality Ability to stay calm and centered during high stress events We couldn't forget to share what books, podcasts, and apps have helped us out the most. So make sure you listen for that! Please share with us your thoughts on meditation in the comments below. Read on for the show notes. Music for this episode: You Got This by Jeff Finley Subscribe Subscribe to the podcast in iTunes Look us up in your favorite podcasting app. I like Pocket Casts. Show Notes 00:00:45 Introductions 00:02:00 Updates from Jeff Finley 00:04:45 What is meditation? 00:07:33 Misconceptions about meditation 00:11:00 How did meditation come into our lives? 00:14:00 Meditation and Yoga 00:18:20 Using the Headspace app 00:21:15 What do people experience when they meditate? 00:25:00 Starting out with meditation and why people avoid meditation 00:30:00 What to do about your thoughts 00:39:15 Your awareness is like a spotlight 00:44:22 What do we do when we meditate? 00:56:00 The benefit of mindfulness 00:58:00 Suffering and judgement, your inner critic 01:03:00 Open Source Yoga (Advanced Yoga Practice) 01:08:00 Mantras and Transcendental Meditation 01:15:40 Getting comfortable sitting for a long time 01:23:05 The benefits of meditation from our experience 01:26:00 Everything can be a meditation 01:30:40 Higher states of consciousness and mystical experiences 01:34:00 How meditation helped with my night terrors and turned them into out of body experiences 01:37:00 Having direct mystical and spiritual experiences yourself 01:39:00 Drugs and psychedelic experiences 01:51:00 How did people do this without apps, books, and Internet? 01:56:25 Our favorite resources for meditation and mindfulness Links and Resources for Meditation: Good reading on Raptitude.com Jeff's new book Wake Up Jeff was a guest on a podcast speaking about his out of body experiences Coach.me and Jeff's coaching profile Headspace app The Miracle Morning book by Hal Elrod Journeys out of the Body book by Robert Monroe The Mindful Way Through Depression book by Mark Williams Sean Webb's I Am Spirituality podcast Body, Mind, and Spirit 101 by Sean Webb How Emotions Work in Humans and Computers book by Sean Webb The Power of Now book by Eckhart Tolle Advanced Yoga Practices website Transcendental Meditation website Calm.com Stop Think and Breathe app Zen Friend app Mindfulness in Plain English book by Bhante Henepola Gunaratana Ram Dass gives LSD to guru with no effect My Big T.O.E. book by Thomas Campbell In episode 5 of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast, Jeff and George talk about meditation. - Do you meditate? If not, why? Sometimes meditation can be intimidating or confusing. We break it down in hopes we can inspire you to add this amazing habit to your da... Jeff and George talk about meditation.

Do you meditate? If not, why? Sometimes meditation can be intimidating or confusing. We break it down in hopes we can inspire you to add this amazing habit to your daily routine.

Both of us have been meditating regularly for two years now and we want to share what we have learned. It has been a major component in our paths out of depression and has directly shaped the way we look at life now and in the future.

More and more people are learning about meditation and it's cousin "mindfulness." We cover the basics of what meditation is and isn't as well as how you can do it. We talk about some of the benefits we have experienced and also get into both the practical applications of meditation and the spiritual.
Some of the benefits we have seen after meditating for 2 years include:

* Depression is virtually completely gone
* Mindfulness lasts well beyond the meditation session
* Reduces stress and anxiety
* Deeper intuition and ability to sense energies
* Increased ability to stay attentive for longer periods of time
* Appreciation for solitude and silence
* More equipped to overcome addictions and bad habits
* Mind-blowing spiritual or mystical experiences
* Dramatically increased awareness of mind, body, and spirit
* Realization of how thoughts form and manifest in reality
* Ability to stay calm and centered during high stress events

We couldn't forget to share what books, podcasts, and apps have helped us out the most. So make sure you listen for that!

Please share with us your thoughts on meditation in the comments below.

Read on for the show notes.

Music for this episode: You Got This by Jeff Finley
Subscribe

* Subscribe to the podcast in iTunes
* Look us up in your favorite podcasting app. I like Pocket Casts.

Show Notes
00:00:45 Introductions
00:02:00 Updates from Jeff Finley
00:04:45 What is meditation?
00:07:33 Misconceptions about meditation
00:11:00 How did meditation come into our lives?
00:14:00 Meditation and Yoga
00:18:20 Using the Headspace app
00:21:15 What do people experience when they meditate?
00:25:00 Starting out with meditation and why people avoid meditation
00:30:00 What to do about your thoughts
00:39:15 Your awareness is like a spotlight
00:44:22 What do we do when we meditate?
00:56:00 The benefit of mindfulness
00:58:00 Suffering and judgement, your inner critic
01:03:00 Open Source Yoga (Advanced Yoga Practice)
01:08:00 Mantras and Transcendental Meditation
01:15:40 Getting comfortable sitting for a long time
01:23:05 The benefits of meditation from our experience
01:26:00 Everything can be a meditation
01:30:40 Higher states of consciousness and mystical experiences
01:34:00 How meditation helped with my night terrors and turned them into out of body experiences
01:37:00 Having direct mystical and spiritual experiences yourself
01:39:00 Drugs and psychedelic experiences
01:51:00 How did people do this without apps, books, and Internet?
01:56:25 Our favorite resources for meditation and mindfulness

Links and Resources for Meditation:

* Good reading on  yes 2:09:26 Out of Body Experiences – All in Your Head? (podcast) https://jefffinley.org/body-experiences-head-interview-gossipist/ Mon, 12 Jan 2015 10:56:46 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=605 Last week I had the pleasure of being a guest on the Pillowtok podcast by Gossipist discussing out of body experiences and lucid dreaming. It was a lively discussion and we get into whether or not these things are "real" or not and I share some tips on how you can try to have one and find out for yourself. Listen to the interview here → You may have read my post about my first out of body experience. Since then I've had over 50 OBEs and lucid dreams. With practice, I was able to learn to have them at will. Well, almost. I can't just say the magic words and *poof* I'm out of my body. The technique isn't hard, it just takes focus, intent, and an open mind. Practically speaking, it's a variant of the Wake Back to Bed Method.  I call it my FUCK IT Method. Not kidding. I would try these techniques and nothing would work. Then I'd say "fuck it" and roll over and go back to sleep. Then somehow, when my body entered the proper state between waking and sleeping (sleep paralysis, vibrational state), my conscious awareness turned back on and as long as I didn't move, I could sink through the bed, float up and out, or roll out. Then I was literally standing next to my body. From there I could leave the bedroom, go outside, or do whatever I wanted. There is no question what I experienced was real. But what does "real" mean anyway? That's a question that certainly came up for me and later inspired me to explore and research consciousness and the nature of reality. Conscious Out of Body Exploration It took me several weeks, lots of research, and quite a few attempts to try to have a conscious out of body experience. But once I did, I felt like I cracked the Da Vinci Code. A whole new world opened up. Read about one of my craziest out of body experiences here. I've been able to consistently have these out of body experiences enough where I now have goals or ideas of things to *do* while out of body. Now, whether you believe this is a literal "out of body" experience or "all in your head" experience, it's still an experience. It's a state of reality you can explore and experiment with. Stuff I've tried in my out of body state: Walking through wallsFlyingSexMeditationRemote viewingUsing thought to make change thingsLooking in the bathroom mirrorTraveling THROUGH the bathroom mirrorTalking to peopleVisiting my neighborsTrying to experience my spiritual essence I plan on using out of body experiences to explore my inner self. In my opinion, this is one path to get answers to life's deepest questions by going within. It's not reliant on any religious text, dogma, or protocol. I get to seek my own answers, experiment with my own consciousness and come away with it knowing what works for me and me alone. Out of body travelers, lucid dreamers, and astral projection practitioners are the modern-day Marco Polos. We are explorers of inner space, much like astronauts and astronomers were explorers of outer space. And since we are literally fractals of the universe, we can explore the universe by going within. There are infinite possibilities. But don't just believe me or take my word for it. Try it for yourself.  If you've ever had flying dreams, dreams where you realize you are dreaming, sleep paralysis, night terrors, or sleepwalking experiences, you are already halfway there. It only takes conscious intent, curiosity, and a desire to learn. You will get there. Again, here is the interview. http://gossipistmag.com/out-of-body-experiences-pillowtok-65/ Please share your experiences in the comments! Last week I had the pleasure of being a guest on the Pillowtok podcast by Gossipist discussing out of body experiences and lucid dreaming. It was a lively discussion and we get into whether or not these things are "real" or not and I share some tips on... Last week I had the pleasure of being a guest on the Pillowtok podcast by Gossipist discussing out of body experiences and lucid dreaming. It was a lively discussion and we get into whether or not these things are "real" or not and I share some tips on how you can try to have one and find out for yourself.



Listen to the interview here →







You may have read my post about my first out of body experience. Since then I've had over 50 OBEs and lucid dreams. With practice, I was able to learn to have them at will.



Well, almost.



I can't just say the magic words and *poof* I'm out of my body. The technique isn't hard, it just takes focus, intent, and an open mind. Practically speaking, it's a variant of the Wake Back to Bed Method.  I call it my FUCK IT Method. Not kidding.



I would try these techniques and nothing would work. Then I'd say "fuck it" and roll over and go back to sleep. Then somehow, when my body entered the proper state between waking and sleeping (sleep paralysis, vibrational state), my conscious awareness turned back on and as long as I didn't move, I could sink through the bed, float up and out, or roll out. Then I was literally standing next to my body. From there I could leave the bedroom, go outside, or do whatever I wanted.



There is no question what I experienced was real. But what does "real" mean anyway? That's a question that certainly came up for me and later inspired me to explore and research consciousness and the nature of reality.



Conscious Out of Body Exploration



It took me several weeks, lots of research, and quite a few attempts to try to have a conscious out of body experience. But once I did, I felt like I cracked the Da Vinci Code. A whole new world opened up.



Read about one of my craziest out of body experiences here.



I've been able to consistently have these out of body experiences enough where I now have goals or ideas of things to *do* while out of body. Now, whether you believe this is a literal "out of body" experience or "all in your head" experience, it's still an experience. It's a state of reality you can explore and experiment with.



Stuff I've tried in my out of body state:



* Walking through walls* Flying* Sex* Meditation* Remote viewing* Using thought to make change things* Looking in the bathroom mirror* Traveling THROUGH the bathroom mirror* Talking to people* Visiting my neighbors* Trying to experience my spiritual essence



I plan on using out of body experiences to explore my inner self. In my opinion, this is one path to get answers to life's deepest questions by going within. It's not reliant on any religious text, dogma, or protocol. I get to seek my own answers, experiment with my own consciousness and come away with it knowing what works for me and me alone.



Out of body travelers, lucid dreamers, and astral projection practitioners are the modern-day Marco Polos. We are explorers of inner space, much like astronauts and astronomers were explorers of outer space.



And since we are literally fractals of the universe,]]> Jeff Finley Habits! Building, Breaking, and Sustaining Positive Habits (ep 04) https://jefffinley.org/habits/ Mon, 29 Dec 2014 11:22:48 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=569 In episode 4 of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast, Jeff and George get into a great discussion on habits. We cover a lot of the psychology of habits and why we do the things we do. We get into how and why we get into bad habits in the first place and what we can do to break them. We talked about what you can do to start new, positive habits and build your life around this idea. Becoming a habit-former. Becoming a person who has control over their life and is aware of outside influences. We talk about being mindful of our triggers and tendencies and how we can identify where we have small little habits or addictions. Some of which are controlling our lives and we don't even know it. If anyone can find a way to talk for two hours about habits, we did it. And it never gets boring! Read on for the show notes. Music for this episode: Evil Lives by Jeff Finley Subscribe Subscribe to the podcast in iTunes Look us up in your favorite podcasting app. I like Pocket Casts. Show Notes 00:00:45 Introductions 00:02:45 Perfectionism, procrastination, holiday breaks 00:03:56 The basics of building habits, triggers, rewards, addictions 00:06:30 What’s more addicting Facebook or smoking? 00:09:15 Emotional triggers for bad habits 00:11:00 Easing anxiety in social situations, avoidance behaviors 00:14:00 Looking at your phone 00:16:00 You don’t actually WANT to do the bad habit 00:17:30 Being present: An altered state of consciousness 00:21:20 Talking to strangers instead of being preoccupied 00:24:30 Dopamine and the reward system in our brain 00:27:00 The manipulation of our reward system 00:28:30 Discipline: What you want now vs what you want most 00:31:00 The future you is a stranger to your present self 00:34:00 Synthetic motivation and our hijacked reward system 00:35:00 Fitting in: Picking up habits of people around us 00:38:10 How to breaking bad habits - change environment 00:42:40 Triggers in your environment, office, etc. 00:44:00 Mental bad habits and limiting beliefs 00:46:06 More psychological habits, approval seeking 00:48:00 Mindfulness of your emotions, triggers, staying alert 00:50:00 Get rid of distractions and hurdles 00:51:30 Making the habit “default” like brushing your teeth 00:52:00 Chaining to other habits, awesome technique 00:54:10 Replacing bad habits with something else 00:55:20 Small habits are the key 00:56:50 Keystone habits, morning routines 00:59:00 Feeling “weird” to not do your new habits 01:00:30 Making your bed, a surprisingly powerful habit 01:03:30 Tiny victories lead to self-esteem boosts 01:05:40 Using novelty to keep the flame lit 01:09:00 Getting past the need to be rewarded 01:10:30 Reducing your addiction to novelty 01:12:00 Taking a break from habits to obtain perspective 01:14:30 Reflecting on your success 01:18:00 Addiction to doing, achieving, and productivity 01:21:20 A longing for a deeper purpose 01:23:00 When playing makes you feel guilty 01:24:30 Pleasing the authority makes me feel productive 01:27:00 Anxiety around not making money with our actions 01:28:20 Addicted to self-improvement and learning 01:31:45 Productive consumption vs productive creation 01:34:00 Porn and exploitation of our primal urges, our lower brain 01:37:00 The Internet never ends, infinite novelty, overload 01:40:20 Unplugging from dopamine intake to reset your brain 01:42:00 Binging on information or inspiration 01:43:00 Addiction to not being addicted 01:44:18 Concrete steps to start building better habits today 01:50:30 Becoming a person who changes and creates their life 01:58:30 Bookend habits - make your bed, do the dishes Links: ZenHabits Power of Habit Book Lifehacker - Lifestyle Design Gamifcation by Design Some people see their future-selves as strangers Tiny Habits by BJ Fogg Keystone Habits The War of Art Lift.do habit-building app The real reason for the 40-hour workweek Your Brain on Porn In episode 4 of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast, Jeff and George get into a great discussion on habits. We cover a lot of the psychology of habits and why we do the things we do. We get into how and why we get into bad habits in the first place and what we ... Jeff and George get into a great discussion on habits. We cover a lot of the psychology of habits and why we do the things we do. We get into how and why we get into bad habits in the first place and what we can do to break them.

We talked about what you can do to start new, positive habits and build your life around this idea. Becoming a habit-former. Becoming a person who has control over their life and is aware of outside influences.

We talk about being mindful of our triggers and tendencies and how we can identify where we have small little habits or addictions. Some of which are controlling our lives and we don't even know it.

If anyone can find a way to talk for two hours about habits, we did it. And it never gets boring! Read on for the show notes.

Music for this episode: Evil Lives by Jeff Finley


Subscribe

* Subscribe to the podcast in iTunes
* Look us up in your favorite podcasting app. I like Pocket Casts.

Show Notes
00:00:45 Introductions
00:02:45 Perfectionism, procrastination, holiday breaks
00:03:56 The basics of building habits, triggers, rewards, addictions
00:06:30 What’s more addicting Facebook or smoking?
00:09:15 Emotional triggers for bad habits
00:11:00 Easing anxiety in social situations, avoidance behaviors
00:14:00 Looking at your phone
00:16:00 You don’t actually WANT to do the bad habit
00:17:30 Being present: An altered state of consciousness
00:21:20 Talking to strangers instead of being preoccupied
00:24:30 Dopamine and the reward system in our brain
00:27:00 The manipulation of our reward system
00:28:30 Discipline: What you want now vs what you want most
00:31:00 The future you is a stranger to your present self
00:34:00 Synthetic motivation and our hijacked reward system
00:35:00 Fitting in: Picking up habits of people around us
00:38:10 How to breaking bad habits - change environment
00:42:40 Triggers in your environment, office, etc.
00:44:00 Mental bad habits and limiting beliefs
00:46:06 More psychological habits, approval seeking
00:48:00 Mindfulness of your emotions, triggers, staying alert
00:50:00 Get rid of distractions and hurdles
00:51:30 Making the habit “default” like brushing your teeth
00:52:00 Chaining to other habits, awesome technique
00:54:10 Replacing bad habits with something else
00:55:20 Small habits are the key
00:56:50 Keystone habits, morning routines
00:59:00 Feeling “weird” to not do your new habits
01:00:30 Making your bed, a surprisingly powerful habit
01:03:30 Tiny victories lead to self-esteem boosts
01:05:40 Using novelty to keep the flame lit
01:09:00 Getting past the need to be rewarded
01:10:30 Reducing your addiction to novelty
01:12:00 Taking a break from habits to obtain perspective
01:14:30 Reflecting on your success
01:18:00 Addiction to doing, achieving, and productivity
01:21:20 A longing for a deeper purpose
01:23:00 When playing makes you feel guilty
01:24:30 Pleasing the authority makes me feel productive
01:27:00 Anxiety around not making money with our actions
01:28:20 Addicted to self-improvement and learning
01:31:45 Productive consumption vs productive creation
01:34:00 Porn and exploitation of our primal urges,]]>
Jeff Finley yes 2:02:28
Depression, Waking Up, and Personal Development – ep 03 https://jefffinley.org/personal-development/ Tue, 25 Nov 2014 20:53:32 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=546 This is episode 3 of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast and it features a new co-host George Coghill. George is an self-employed artist who has carved his career out of cartooning and illustration over the past decade. But he also blogs about his personal development and self-improvement journey at The Overthinker. We met up a couple weeks ago to hike in the woods and share stories of overcoming depression and waking up. We talked for hours and hours and I felt like it would be amazing to bring this conversation to the podcast. I'm also taking a step up in the Podcast and I'm going to do a "season" format. Where we set the intention to record 10 episodes for Season 1 and then stop and decide if we want to continue. In this podcast we cover what it was like living with depression and how we used our depression to grow into who we are today. We get into a bunch of topics on everything from meditation, personal development, society, culture, and more. This is a taste of what's to come. Enjoy! This is episode 3 of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast and it features a new co-host George Coghill. George is an self-employed artist who has carved his career out of cartooning and illustration over the past decade. George Coghill. George is an self-employed artist who has carved his career out of cartooning and illustration over the past decade. But he also blogs about his personal development and self-improvement journey at The Overthinker.

We met up a couple weeks ago to hike in the woods and share stories of overcoming depression and waking up. We talked for hours and hours and I felt like it would be amazing to bring this conversation to the podcast.



I'm also taking a step up in the Podcast and I'm going to do a "season" format. Where we set the intention to record 10 episodes for Season 1 and then stop and decide if we want to continue.

In this podcast we cover what it was like living with depression and how we used our depression to grow into who we are today.

We get into a bunch of topics on everything from meditation, personal development, society, culture, and more. This is a taste of what's to come. Enjoy!]]>
Jeff Finley yes 1:53:25
Charis Melina Brown – How to Live in Alignment with your True Self – ep 02 https://jefffinley.org/charis-melina-brown/ Tue, 07 Oct 2014 00:47:31 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=510 In Episode 2 of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast, I have an eye opening discussion with Charis Melina Brown. I came across her YouTube channel after searching for information on Starseeds. Who is Charis? She's an example of someone who is living in alignment with her true soul expression. She's vibrant and in love with life. Charis currently lives in Sedona, AZ and has written a few books and teaches classes and workshops from living your purpose to awakening your DNA. She always seems to inspire me and help me realize that my struggles don't have to be such a big deal. Her attitude is always so positive and upbeat. She calls herself a modern day practitioner of Magic. She's one of the smartest, most knowledgeable people I know on the subject of spirituality, non-physical energies, aliens and ETs, the nature of reality, dreams, etc. Her excitement for these topics is contagious. You can tell she LIVES this stuff. From her website, her bio reads: Throughout history, there have been medicine men and medicine women, shaman, priests, and alchemists who have always played a unique part in society. In today's world, if a child feels the call to grow up and become a teacher, a doctor, a chef, or a businessman, there are role models to provide a path towards that goal. But kids who are innate priestesses or wizards have no real adults doing this to observe. This is what I do. I am a "magician" living here in the modern world. I am educated with two master's degrees and chose to leave school and write my own books three months shy of graduating with a Ph.D. I make a good living, I drive my car, check my email, make dinner, and I also rock out amazing rituals under the Full Moon, talk to ghosts, aliens, and elemental nature spirits, and remember my past lives. You can absolutely do all of it and be a perfectly sane, balanced, awesome person who rocks existence on multiple levels. My job is to show those who want to learn how. Episode Length: 92 minutes Recording Date: October 6, 2014 Episode Breakdown: 02:46 -  Background on Charis Melina Brown 04:08 -  Imaginary Friends in Childhood 04:45 -  Spiritual Crisis & Awakening 06:00 -  Clairvoyance or Schizophrenia? 07:40 -  Thirst for Knowledge and the Internet 11:25 -  Discovering Starseeds and Esoteric Stuff 13:00 -  First Contact - Most Intense Moment of Charis' life 23:00 -  Paradigm Shifts, Activations, OBEs, NDEs 25:20 -  Doubters - Have you researched it? 26:30 -  No particular calling is better or "correct" 27:50 -  What's my life purpose? Doubting it. 30:30 -  Life purpose "wobbling" and shifting 33:06 -  Mistaking Procrastination for Needing to Rest 34:20 -  Laziness, Resistance, Procrastination, Rest 35:45 -  Changing things up to stay reinvigorated 37:25 -  You don't have to have ONE purpose forever 38:00 -  Learn to end things gracefully with no sadness 40:02 -  One thing in common is DIY 41:27 -  How to do what you love full time? 44:12 -  Integrating spiritual concepts in "normal" life 46:05 -  Depression - a life that's not lived "in alignment" 47:55 -  Fear, Fear, Fear - Learning the best way to deal with it 49:25 -  Nothing has to be a big deal ever 50:14 -  Leaps of faith are hardly ever needed 52:00 -  Changing small bits instead of massive changes 53:00 -  Do you have to do it the scariest way in order for it to count? 55:10 -  The inside is your compass, but the outside is your weather 55:26 -  These lives, we are just playing dress-up - it's not actually real 57:10 -  How to keep fear from coming back? Just stop caring about the results 58:30 -  Wounds and holes in your energy field attract triggers 1:00:00 -  Relationship conflicts, criticism, etc 1:02:00 -  Psychic vampires, codependency, conditional love 1:03:28 -  Everyone wants to be important, victim/warrior archetype 1:05:33 -  It's not about what happens to you, In Episode 2 of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast, I have an eye opening discussion with Charis Melina Brown. I came across her YouTube channel after searching for information on Starseeds. - Who is Charis? She's an example of someone who is living in alignm... Charis Melina Brown. I came across her YouTube channel after searching for information on Starseeds.

Who is Charis? She's an example of someone who is living in alignment with her true soul expression. She's vibrant and in love with life. Charis currently lives in Sedona, AZ and has written a few books and teaches classes and workshops from living your purpose to awakening your DNA. She always seems to inspire me and help me realize that my struggles don't have to be such a big deal. Her attitude is always so positive and upbeat.



She calls herself a modern day practitioner of Magic. She's one of the smartest, most knowledgeable people I know on the subject of spirituality, non-physical energies, aliens and ETs, the nature of reality, dreams, etc. Her excitement for these topics is contagious. You can tell she LIVES this stuff.





From her website, her bio reads:

Throughout history, there have been medicine men and medicine women, shaman, priests, and alchemists who have always played a unique part in society. In today's world, if a child feels the call to grow up and become a teacher, a doctor, a chef, or a businessman, there are role models to provide a path towards that goal. But kids who are innate priestesses or wizards have no real adults doing this to observe.

This is what I do.

I am a "magician" living here in the modern world. I am educated with two master's degrees and chose to leave school and write my own books three months shy of graduating with a Ph.D. I make a good living, I drive my car, check my email, make dinner, and I also rock out amazing rituals under the Full Moon, talk to ghosts, aliens, and elemental nature spirits, and remember my past lives.

You can absolutely do all of it and be a perfectly sane, balanced, awesome person who rocks existence on multiple levels.

My job is to show those who want to learn how.


Episode Length: 92 minutes
Recording Date: October 6, 2014


Episode Breakdown:

* 02:46 -  Background on Charis Melina Brown
* 04:08 -  Imaginary Friends in Childhood
* 04:45 -  Spiritual Crisis & Awakening
* 06:00 -  Clairvoyance or Schizophrenia?
* 07:40 -  Thirst for Knowledge and the Internet
* 11:25 -  Discovering Starseeds and Esoteric Stuff
* 13:00 -  First Contact - Most Intense Moment of Charis' life
* 23:00 -  Paradigm Shifts, Activations, OBEs, NDEs
* 25:20 -  Doubters - Have you researched it?
* 26:30 -  No particular calling is better or "correct"
* 27:50 -  What's my life purpose? Doubting it.
* 30:30 -  Life purpose "wobbling" and shifting
* 33:06 -  Mistaking Procrastination for Needing to Rest
* 34:20 -  Laziness, Resistance, Procrastination, Rest
* 35:45 -  Changing things up to stay reinvigorated
* 37:25 -  You don't have to have ONE purpose forever
* 38:00 -  Learn to end things gracefully with no sadness
* 40:02 -  One thing in common is DIY
* 41:27 -  How to do what you love full time?
* 44:12 -  Integrating spiritual concepts in "normal" life
* 46:05 -  Depression - a life that's not lived "in alignment"
* 47:55 -  Fear, Fear, Fear - Learning the best way to deal with it
* 49:25 -  Nothing has to be a big deal ever
* 50:14 -  Leaps of faith are hardly ever needed
* 52:00 -  Changing small bits instead of massive changes
]]>
Jeff Finley yes 1:32:46
Gigi Young – Finding your Purpose and Starseeds – ep 01 https://jefffinley.org/gigi-young/ Mon, 01 Sep 2014 12:35:00 +0000 http://makermistaker.com/?p=384 This is the very first episode of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast! In this episode I talk with Gigi Young, a psychic intuitive that teaches and mentors others through a spiritual and cosmic perspective. I initially found her on YouTube talking about consciousness, spirituality, and extra terrestrials. The way she communicated esoteric ideas resonated nicely with where I'm at in my path and I hired her for an intuitive coaching session a few weeks back. In that session she used her connections to her spirit guides to help me see my life's circumstances and struggles in a new light. She helped me gain clarity on my sense of purpose and provided a welcome perspective that fit with my newly expanded view of reality. In this inaugural podcast episode, Gigi and I dive deep into mind-blowing and esoteric subject matter. We cover a lot of ground about finding and living your purpose, consciousness, spirituality, metaphysical subjects, starseeds, and ETs. Episode Length: 92 minutes Recording Date: Aug 29, 2014 Episode Breakdown: 04:18 psychic abilities, stereotypes, skepticism 12:49 from atheist/skeptic to spiritual/occult 15:00 studying metaphysics instead of partying 20:00 finding your innate truth and purpose 24:00 music taste, resonance, and frequency 30:00 finding joy and thriving vs what feels good now 34:00 finding your own voice, taking a media detox 35:00 inspiration and our subconscious, not getting discouraged 38:40 starseeds, cosmic spirituality, oversouls, past lives 47:00 dimensions of consciousness 51:00 lucid dreams, out of body experiences, astral projection 57:00 thoughts, manifestation, imagination, law of attraction 1:04:00 taking responsibility for yourself as a creator 1:07:00 every relationship is a reflection of yourself 1:10:30 astrology, birth charts, starseeds, your true nature 1:16:54 finding your purpose, your authenticity 1:19:00 selflessness vs selfishness, changing the world 1:24:00 advice for creators, Gigi's future plans, living in flow 1:26:30 masculinity, David Deida, the Way of the Superior Man 1:31:00 closing thoughts Links Gigi's Website Gigi's YouTube Channel References Miss Cleo David Deida Shadow Work Get your own birth chart Starseed Hotline The Secret What the Bleep do We Know My post about The Way of the Superior Man My post about working with Kelly La Sha My post about my first out of body experience My post about me possibly being a Starseed Books Dreams of Awakening Secret of the Soul The Alchemy of Nine Dimensions The Way of the Superior Man Liquid Mirror by Kelly La Sha This is the very first episode of the Maker/Mistaker Podcast! In this episode I talk with Gigi Young, a psychic intuitive that teaches and mentors others through a spiritual and cosmic perspective. - I initially found her on YouTube talking about cons... Gigi Young, a psychic intuitive that teaches and mentors others through a spiritual and cosmic perspective.

I initially found her on YouTube talking about consciousness, spirituality, and extra terrestrials. The way she communicated esoteric ideas resonated nicely with where I'm at in my path and I hired her for an intuitive coaching session a few weeks back. In that session she used her connections to her spirit guides to help me see my life's circumstances and struggles in a new light. She helped me gain clarity on my sense of purpose and provided a welcome perspective that fit with my newly expanded view of reality.

In this inaugural podcast episode, Gigi and I dive deep into mind-blowing and esoteric subject matter. We cover a lot of ground about finding and living your purpose, consciousness, spirituality, metaphysical subjects, starseeds, and ETs.



Episode Length: 92 minutes
Recording Date: Aug 29, 2014


Episode Breakdown:

* 04:18 psychic abilities, stereotypes, skepticism
* 12:49 from atheist/skeptic to spiritual/occult
* 15:00 studying metaphysics instead of partying
* 20:00 finding your innate truth and purpose
* 24:00 music taste, resonance, and frequency
* 30:00 finding joy and thriving vs what feels good now
* 34:00 finding your own voice, taking a media detox
* 35:00 inspiration and our subconscious, not getting discouraged
* 38:40 starseeds, cosmic spirituality, oversouls, past lives
* 47:00 dimensions of consciousness
* 51:00 lucid dreams, out of body experiences, astral projection
* 57:00 thoughts, manifestation, imagination, law of attraction
* 1:04:00 taking responsibility for yourself as a creator
* 1:07:00 every relationship is a reflection of yourself
* 1:10:30 astrology, birth charts, starseeds, your true nature
* 1:16:54 finding your purpose, your authenticity
* 1:19:00 selflessness vs selfishness, changing the world
* 1:24:00 advice for creators, Gigi's future plans, living in flow
* 1:26:30 masculinity, David Deida, the Way of the Superior Man
* 1:31:00 closing thoughts


Links

* Gigi's Website
* Gigi's YouTube Channel

References

* Miss Cleo
* David Deida
* Shadow Work
* Get your own birth chart
* Starseed Hotline
* The Secret
* What the Bleep do We Know
* My post about The Way of the Superior Man
* My post about working with Kelly La Sha
* My post about my first out of body experience
* yes 1:32:23