This morning I had what I think was my first out of body experience that I witnessed with full consciousness from start to finish. Some of you probably won’t believe me or think that I’m crazy. But I’m going to try to describe it.
Update Jan 6, 2015: Listen to my interview on the Pillowtok Podcast with Gossipist where I speak about out of body experiences and lucid dreaming
Let me preface this with the fact that I have been meditating every day for about 2-3 months consistently. I’ve been learning about spiritual enlightenment, the ego, the mind, and even the science behind what we believe to be Heaven.
While my mediation practice is about discovering my true self and detaching myself from my emotions and thoughts, I have been able to experience a few mild states of peace and bliss, sometimes accompanied by sensations of energy pulsing through my veins and a pounding heartbeat and shortness of breath. I think my desire to have an out of body experience or transcend into some spiritual existence ends up preventing me from actually experiencing it. That’s kind of the way mediation works – if you try hard or want it, it won’t come.
So my meditation this morning wasn’t very different from any of my other sessions. In fact, I felt like my mind was pretty distracted and jumping all over the place. I observed a slight annoyance grow into a severe agitation and desire to quit. I noticed a heap of nausea and a sensation to throw up and I quickly stopped and went and laid down hoping I wouldn’t barf. I chalked it up to being something in the smoothie I ate earlier which has consistently given me stomach aches lately and I am not sure why.
I watched an episode of The Wire on my laptop and then afterward I closed my eyes and didn’t care if I drifted off to sleep. What came next was extremely fascinating.
As I lie there with my eyes closed, I wasn’t trying to meditate or be present. Suddenly I visualized a rectangular black box. It could have been a memory of the TV screen in the room. My awareness started to move into the black box and then out of nowhere I was literally yanked or sucked out of consciousness. Like a noticeable change of dimension that takes about a second to occur and it is very hard to miss. This is not drifting off to sleep!
Now this effect has happened to me in the past but often in the middle of the night while I’m half asleep. And it’s typically accompanied by an extreme state of fear and dread. When I’m half asleep (or already asleep) I would have experiences which I think are called night terrors. Or moments where I am semi-conscious and aware of my surroundings but unable to move. I’m overwhelmed with extreme fear with no distinct source. When I have these night terrors, all I know is there is a supremely evil presence in the room and I just have to get the fuck out of there but I can’t. I would try to yell for my wife to wake me up but she just hears an increasingly loud groaning coming from me. It freaks her out and she has to shake me awake and when I finally come to I feel like she saved my life!
Sometimes, during these night terrors, I would try to attack the evil presence. It felt like me floating and diving into the darkness in a rage of suicidal fury. Only eventually I would get shaken awake by my wife and realize it was not real. I would attempt to go back to sleep but instead of drifting peacefully off to sleep, I would feel the sensation of being sucked back into this terror state and I would try desperately to avoid it. I would turn on lights and listen to music because I was so afraid of falling asleep.
Controlling my Awareness
What I’ve learned in my meditation practice is mindfulness. To simply observe without judging or reacting. So I vowed next time I would have a night terror I would try to sit and live with the fear and surrender to it calmly without trying to escape. Where would it lead me? What would happen?
So this morning when I felt that sensation of being sucked out of consciousness, I witnessed a rush of fear take over me. But this triggered me to be mindful and I immediately “woke up” and became conscious that this was happening. I recognized the feeling and the associated fear and when I brought the feeling into my awareness, I witnessed the fear melt away in an instant. Just like that. What followed was a slightly cool sensation of energy rushing through my arms and legs. Like a shiver or chill but it lasted longer and felt wonderful and tingly.
Woah, Something is Happening
I immediately started to get excited and think, “Is this the beginning of the enlightenment experience? Am I going to start hallucinating and seeing angels and meet God?” I quickly noticed my wanting and refocused on the sensations. I started to become light and noticed that I was tipping over to the left and it was like I was floating. I then was able to navigate my way through the living room with full consciousness. Like I was a floating spirit. I was so excited that I was experiencing this!
I floated down the hallway and into the office where my wife exited the doorway and passed through me and I was curious if she noticed me or not. She didn’t. She was in her bathrobe and she went into the office as I was hanging out in the hallway. I was still so excited I wondered where this would go next.
Before I could go any further I started to come back to earth so to speak. I “woke up” laying on the couch just like I started. And my wife ended up coming out of the bathroom and into the room and obviously had no clue that I was just having this experience. She was still in her pajamas, not her bathrobe so my vision of her in my OBE was a hallucination. It was not real. She was in the bathroom getting ready the whole time this was happening to me on the couch.
I’ve had lucid dreams before where I realized I was dreaming and could control myself and make decisions for a while before I woke up. I’ve had night terrors and woke up before sleep paralysis wore off and felt like I couldn’t move. But none of those have been truly conscious. In fact, I really couldn’t understand what was happening.
This time I witnessed everything from start to finish and was not a dream or a middle-of-the-night foggy memory. To me, this is really cool and interesting. I feel like I could recreate this experience. Next time this happens I’ll tame my excitement and continue to observe. Perhaps a deeper experience is out there.
I was able to do it again last night. I woke up after about 2 hours of sleep and was lying on my back in bed. I noticed the sensation of being pulled back, but it wasn’t as strong. In fact, it’s like it tried a couple times before it finally “got” me. I did feel a slight fear and was nervous about it but I let it go and sure enough, I floated up and out of my body.
This time I remembered to look back at my sleeping body to see if I was there and I was. I even tried to touch my face. That was totally weird. I feel like my mind creates what it wants to see in some ways though because I felt I “knew” my wife was in the bed too and I saw her there. but in reality, she hadn’t gone to bed yet.
I continued to navigate down the hallway into the living room and out my front door. I was thrilled that I was able to get here so easily it seemed. I decided I was going to go run down the street! I remember choosing to lock the door behind me thinking the cat might get out. Then I started blissfully running down the street in the darkness and rain! It was amazing! Then I saw an older african american man running on the sidewalk as well but he didn’t notice me. I ran along side him for a second before I ended up coming back to reality.
When I came back to reality, I had a slight feeling of satisfaction but a little uneasiness which causes me to want to pull the blankets over my head and sort of hide until I fall back asleep. And that’s all I remember from last night.
These entries are old. I find ur story fascinating. I too experience sleep paralysis. The first time was in my teen years. I have continued to ex. It randomly and it feels terrifying. Do u think this is s lucid dream? Mine always starts pre sleep. I can feel it coming and speak and then a rush of energy Comes over and I can’t move, feeling as though my “ soul” is being sucked out. I have also experienced OBE while in elementary school while deeply looking at a bug crawling on a flower. I saw a grid pattern covering everything and then felt like I was off of the planet in mostly darkness except for a pin dot of white light. Have you ever had an OBE?
My experience is similar in the way of how Jeff explained it in the paragraph above regarding “seeing”. That explanation was very close to my experience.
My perceived similarities, differences, and a little background:
1. I’ve had three OBE’s in my life over the years. All self induced. No training, reading, tapes, practicing, DMT (I know), etc.
Maybe my own form of meditation, breathing, and focus.
I’d focus on not feeling anything physical. My body on the bed, limbs resting on the blanket, yet not feeling it at all beneath me. I essentially turned all that off in a way.
Two times were had while in that meditative state while lying supine on the bed. One while I was fully awake standing and in public, though shorter in duration. A few blips that would seem to last 3-5 seconds per time. The first two, maybe minutes in duration.
2. I have never experienced any fears of any kind with my OBE’s. No night terrors, or paralysis associated before, during, or after. No feelings of my soul or energy being sucked out that I recall. The energy was there. It was fluid yet airy and very comforting. Colors were normal. Just a peaceful feeling. Full awareness of the situation. Not all senses were as clear, such as physical feelings, taste, or smell. For example, I could see and move around but more floating like one would imagine a ghost moving maybe? Not walking on my feet. At least no physical feeling of it. I felt slightly elevated. No care in the world about the temperature around me or smells, time, etc. It was irrelevant and therefore absent in those moments possibly. It was a lot to take in for the first time.
3. I was never able to look at myself while “out” moving around my room. I would “wake up” as soon as I’d try and view myself. But I was fully aware of “where I was” while I was in that state.
I never felt trapped in that state. I knew I could leave any time at will.
I did that twice in one night.
The second time testing the waters more, so to speak.
While it felt natural and fine I knew this was new to me so I was learning as well. Baby steps?
I remember looking at the door and wondering if I could open it or just move right through it. I went to do just that but came back once my own body became more than just peripheral in my field of vision.
I Haven’t gotten further than that as I’ve not attempted it since. Not sure why as my level of interest or intrigue has not wavered since then. It’s increased. I will try it again at some point.
The third time I was somewhat surprised by it. I was standing in a small group listening to the conversation. I kind of checked out in a sense and then I was outside the group and my body a few feet away. Just observing in place and looking around. No one noticed. I knew I was there but didn’t take a full look at myself. Just a silhouette kind of in my periphery. Then back in my body. I did that a couple more times and then it was done. I made it happen again while in the fresh moment the last two times with success but, like I said, it was short in duration.
Sorry for the book. Thank you for the platform, even if this post is years old.
Keep it up.
Hi Jeff, very interesting read.
I too had a very weird and scary experience about 2 years ago.
I ‘woke’ in bed in the night to feel my body being lifted by the duvet. I looked down at my body to see it too and then started to freak out as I knew I was ‘awake’.
I couldn’t control it and before I knew it I was being carried out of my bed, out of the bedroom door and about to go down the stairs, it was as if there was something invisible at each corner of the duvet.
I struggle to get up out of the duvet but it was swift moving, I tried to call out to my daughter as I past her room at the top of the stairs but could only manage a whisper.
I knew I was in danger of being ‘taken’ so I tried with all my might to fight it.
Then I woke up but couldn’t figure out how I was in my bed. It was so real. It happened, I know it did and I’ve been looking for answers ever since and if anyone else has ever experienced this. I felt the presence of something on each corner of duvet, like entities.
Can you control as when to have this OBE ?
Have you ever tried time travel ?
Can you influence other people or their astral energy?
I’d say the answer could be YES to all those questions… but it’s not always 100% or consistent. The best you can do is try and see what happens.
I’ve been having vibrations while asleep since I was a teenager, can’t even count how may, and felt like demons were pressing my chest or wanted to have sex, I resisted the feeling and read prayers to let it go of me, and it would eventually go away but with a lot struggles, and feelings of fear, I searched in religious sites, and all explained that there are demons, and that one must be more religious, this made me sink deeper into depression, after I got married, this feeling still persisted, I researched more scientific findings, and felt that I can actually do something cool with this feeling. I’m married, 41, and have 3 kids. I’ve had a previous semi OBE experience, but Last night I was feeling very blessed, and fell asleep with my 2 year daughter in my arms, I had the feeling of sleep paralysis, but gave my self self assurance, and not to feel afraid, and heard the loud sounds, but for the first time felt like a ghostly whitish, grayish transparent undefined being, pulled out of myself, and that ugly vibration pressing feeling disappeared immediate, it was dark in the room, and suddenly I felt a breezy cool air physically flowing around me, I floated still, but didn’t know what to do next, it just felt calming, and special, before I know it this being turned around and zapped back into my body. I woke up with my daughter still asleep on me. an OBE can happen even when a baby’s touching you. I guess I need more reassurance, as my fears during my teenage sleep paralysis and religious misconceptions keep kreepinf up, and coming in my way for something awesome. Im hoping one day with OBE we can experience our souls true longings, and true purpose, why do we have these? I don’t think these are haphazard.
Pretty interesting experience. I know it can be scary but you handled it well. I would focus on dropping any and all belief systems and go with your inner knowing or gut feeling. Do what works.